Imagine you’re sitting in a waiting room ready to be interviewed for a job. Your resume is good and you feel that you’re the right person for it. Still, your palms are sweating, you’re nervous and can’t help but comparing yourself to other candidates. And when you hear them boasting about their previous successes, you start thinking to yourself: “I’m never gonna make it, they’re apparently better”. Here are 3 simple self esteem boosters that will help you become aware of your qualities.
Booster #1- Focus on Your Assets
First, are you sure that you have the right picture of yourself? Are you prone to exaggerate your faults and undermine your virtues? Think about it for a second. People with low self-esteem are masters in looking down at themselves. Nothing but perfection in everything they do can make them feel good about themselves.
If a friend praises your cooking skills you answer that it is easy and that anyone can do it. Maybe you are just humble but there is a difference between being modest and underestimating yourself. People seldom give compliments and if you’re treated with one, believe it. Don’t undermine your qualities by comparing yourself with someone who is better in one specific area.
There will always be someone better in something. Congratulate yourself because you’ve managed to make a flawless lasagne. Yes, Jamie Oliver’s would certainly be better but no one expects you to cook like a professional but yourself.
Your neighbour might be a better housewife, your sister more fluent in French and your boss more proficient in computer skills, but a mere fact that you have all of these qualities (and many others) in you, is a reason enough to believe in yourself.
So, don’t get nervous because a person sitting next to you in a waiting room talks about the jobs he arranged for his previous company. Maybe he has good connections, but keep in mind that you are persuasive and a good negotiator. Focus on your assets! Know what you are good at. There has to be something! If not, get good at something useful. Become the best at something. This will do great things to your self-esteem in the long run.
Booster #2- Reflect on Your Achievements
Are you too focused on what you haven’t achieved? Having high expectations in every field, failure in just one segment makes you start viewing yourself as not good enough for anything. For example, you’ve managed to finish a project at work, made a costume for your daughter’s recital, took your son to swimming. But you’ve forgotten that your friends are coming over to dinner, so you didn’t find the time to cook.
And now you think of those women who are capable of doing everything. Well, no one can be Lynette Scavo and Bree Van de Kamp at the same time. Give yourself some slack. Learn to appreciate what you have achieved. Change your point of view, concentrate on what you have done and you will most probably realise that you are not as bad as you think.
While waiting for your employer to call you, think about your previous career achievements.
Booster #3- Your Only Competition is Yesterday’s You!
Don’t fall into the trap of other peoples’ confidence. Every day you listen to your colleague boasting about her gorgeous children, perfect husband, professional success, etc. While listening, you compare your life and achievements with hers and start feeling like a complete failure.
But, do you ever stop and ask yourself if everything you’ve heard is really true? People who praise themselves and appear too confident, usually have some unsolved issues in their private life. Or, even more likely, being aware of their shortcomings, they exaggerate their successes until they convince themselves that they indeed are special. And, your insecurity feeds their ego perfectly.
Take some time and think about people with whom you feel worthless. Once you understand their motives, don’t allow yourself to be fooled by the image they create of themselves.
So, while sitting in the above-mentioned waiting room you shouldn’t pay attention to your competitor’s boosting. There is no way of knowing that what they say is really true.
Stop comparing yourself to others. It’s counter-productive. Compare yourself to yourself, not other people. Become the best you that you can be. Are you better today than last month, last year? Create goals. Make progress little by little, this will fuel your self-esteem whenever you make a step forward. Learn to motivate yourself.
Life is full of different “waiting rooms” and you’ll be “interviewed” many times. Think about the self-esteem boosters you have just read about. It’s not easy to build up self-confidence. But the image created of yourself depends on the faith you have in yourself.
Remember, only once you are satisfied with yourself, will you be ready to face various “employers”. Believe it and you’ll achieve it.
Also, make sure to check out these 5 Best Self-Confidence Exercises, and learn how to boost your confidence.
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