Do Your Friends Make You Spend More?

Could your friends be partly responsible for your inability to save? Here's what to do if your friends make you spend more money.

Have you noticed that a day out shopping with the girls hurts your checking account more than a shopping trip you take when you’re alone?

Friends are great in many ways. They offer a shoulder to cry on when times get tough and are always willing to celebrate when you succeed. However, there are some circumstances that make their friendships quite literally valuable (or invaluable, as the case may be).

The friend/money connection

three girls shopping together at clothes store

There are numerous ways that different friends can negatively impact the current state of your savings account. Here are a few to consider:

  • Her expensive tendencies rub off on you. If you have a friend that only likes the finer things in life, she may try to convince you that brand name designer goods is the only way to go. Certainly, you can do your best to resist her way of thinking, but it isn’t out of line to expect that some of her expensive ideologies may wear off on you. Therefore, you may see yourself purchasing higher priced items because you’ve grown to love the brand via your friends’ urgings.
  • You may splurge more if your friend is spending more. Even if you have every intention of not buying dessert with dinner, if your friend is getting it she will likely try to convince you to do the same. She may even use guilt to her advantage by asking you to order it so she doesn’t look like a “pig.” Either way, you wind up spending more.
  • She may think she’s doing you a favor. Your friends want to see you happy. So, if you love one dress over the other, for instance, she’ll probably try to talk you into the purchase that makes you smile versus the one that makes your savings account smile. It’s not that she’s not looking out for your financial future; it’s just that she’s more focused on your happiness instead.

Yes, your friends can have quite an impact on how much money you spend on items you either want ord need. But, does that mean that you’re going to be stuck financially if you continue your friendships with them? It doesn’t have to.

How to break the connection

Certainly, you can’t expect to continue to spend more than you should without feeling the effects. So, you have to be able to break the connection before it breaks you financially. Here are some steps that can help you do just that:

Step #1: Share your financial goals. Your friends need to thoroughly understand what your goals are. If they know that you are trying to save for a house or for a cushy retirement, they may be less likely to attempt to persuade you to spend money and may even help you save it. This will make them your biggest ally versus your financial nemesis.

Step #2: Ask for their support. Even if you share your goals with your closest gal pals, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they’ll get the hint to help you with your spending habits because chances are good that they don’t even realize when they’re leading you astray. Come right out and tell them that you’d like their help.

Step #3: Be clear in your expectations. If you want your friends to help you save instead of spend, you’re going to have to tell them specifically how to do that. For instance, if you have a friend that always tries to talk you into name brand items, you may want to ask her to refrain from doing so. If she truly cares about you, she will respect your request and find someone else to spend massive amounts of money with.

Step #4: Set and enforce boundaries. If your friendships are majorly impacting your ability to meet your financial goals, you may have to become assertive with your friends. This may mean putting up boundaries so that you don’t find yourself in a position to overspend. Maybe you’ll have to temporarily suspend your weekend mani and pedi appointments with your pals until you get your checkbook in better order. Be prepared for resistance, but don’t give in and let your friend’s spending habits derail your final goals.

Friends can certainly distract you from where you want to be with your money, but they can also get you where you want to be as well. Follow these steps and you’ll soon find that your “partners in crime” will be helping you build your savings account up versus draining it dry.

About the author

Christina DeBusk

Changing careers mid-life from law enforcement to writing, Christina spends her days helping others enrich their businesses and personal lives one word at a time.

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