Are you looking for a way to love food and not feel guilt or shame when you eat? These four tips will jumpstart you on the path to a happy and healthy relationship with food and your body. I call it your “Happy Eating Flow”.
- Are you someone who reaches for the phone and orders a pizza, or runs to the market to get a quart of ice cream if you’re sad, happy, bored or lonely?
- Do you constantly think about food, or are you uncomfortable in your own skin?
- Do you avoid seeing friends and family because you feel that you overeat?
If any of these statements resonate with you, you might want to examine your relationship with food.
A lot of people tune out when they have difficult feelings and opt to use food for comfort instead of a healthier alternative like taking a walk in the park or watching a movie with friends. I have worked with a lot of women who were emotional eaters as was I until I created my own Happy Eating Flow.
In my work with clients, I have found four emotional keys that I have used myself to heal my relationship with food and body. These tips will start the process to help you evolve your relationship with food to match your desire to live a happy life.
1. A little optimism goes a long way!
Optimism provides power over painful experiences. Every time I ate emotionally or in secret, I felt shame and guilt, which was indeed painful at the time. I realized, though, that going through those experiences made me understand what it truly felt like and, in turn, makes me a powerful supporter for my clients.
If I could survive my emotional relationship with food, then so could others who experienced the same thing.
When I realized this, I discovered that every tough experience holds a valuable lesson. The true meaning of optimism is realizing that the more painful the event, the more profound the lesson.
Once you acknowledge and accept and how it relates to your relationship with food, you can never again look at a setback as all bad. Optimism gives you power.
Happy Eating Flow Action: For every negative thought you have, create three positive ones.
2. Love yourself to a better you!
We often think that being loved by someone is the best feeling in the world, but it’s really the second best. The best thing you can do to heal your relationship with food is to love yourself first.
Learning to love yourself not only helps to boost confidence and build self-esteem, but also makes you less likely to want to overeat.
Sometimes this is difficult for men and women who have fallen into the habit of using food as an escape. A vital step is acknowledging that you want to change because you deserve to be happy and healthy.
Happy Eating Flow Action: List 10 healthy foods you love and you’ll feel loved after eating. Make them your primary go-to snacks and meals.
3. Perspective will give you power in the long run
People who struggle with their relationship with food tend to see things in black and white, while those who have a healthy relationship with food see things in color.
For example, if someone who has an unhealthy relationship with food has a binging episode and overdoes it one night, they automatically think that it’s always going to be that way and they shouldn’t even try to get better.
In contrast, people who have a healthy relationship with food acknowledge the slip and that tomorrow’s always a new day and a new start.
Applying this way of thinking daily will help you to change your thinking patterns over time, and you will be less likely to want to engage in behaviors that aren’t good for your body and soul.
Try writing about your food perspectives daily—when you overeat, focus on all the times you didn’t overeat. This will help you to be more realistic about how you’re really living your life instead of the story you’re telling yourself in your head.
Happy Eating Flow Action: Identify and write down when you first had the emotional experience you do when you binge or eat foods that don’t love you back.
4. Being proactive is essential
People who have a healthy relationship with food participate in their own destinies and create their own happiness. They don’t wait for events or other people to make them happy.
They’re not passive, and understand that for there to be a change in their relationship with food, they need to reach outside their comfort zone; they need to practice healthy coping mechanisms that will help them to break free from emotional eating.
When I first started my journey towards eating more healthily and loving my body, I would go on daily walks and write in a journal to remind myself just how awesome I was during this beautiful transformation.
Happy Eating Flow Action: Keep it simple, and use a basic journal with mindful questions and quotes. Creating your Happy Eating Flow is a lifestyle practice.
Remember: there will be times when you still want to overeat when you experience negative emotions—and even you have positive emotions. All you can do is start to work on trusting yourself.
Trust will show you that, even if you have a binge episode, you have faith in yourself that you will provide yourself with love and kindness. This will eventually break the cycle.
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