The Hardest Words to Say in the English language…
Isn’t it baffling how three little words can convey so much meaning in a relationship, and yet at the same time produce so much confusion and anxiety? Saying “I love you” to your boyfriend might be difficult for a number of reasons. What do those three little words really mean anyway? How do you know that you both feel the same way when you say it to each other? Why does it make you feel so nervous to express how you feel to someone you care about?
That’s all it is really, an expression of how you feel. It doesn’t have to mean much more than that. It doesn’t have to refer to an undying kind of romantic love that will last for several lifetimes, and it doesn’t mean that you have to be willing to die for anyone! Yet with the expression of intimate feelings comes expectation and the inevitable vulnerability of feeling exposed.
So, whether you’re the one with the “I love you” complex or he is, I have put together 10 handy little ways to let your boyfriend know how you feel, without necessarily having to say those pesky words over and over again.
#1 Compliment him
When you are feeling soppy and those three words are practically dripping off your lips, but for whatever reason you can’t bring yourself to tell your boyfriend you love him, transfer the soppiness to something specific and tell him what you love about him. For example, “I love it when you do that thing…” or “You look so sexy in that jacket”.
#2 Practice saying the word ‘love’ in different sentences
A good way to get you both used to hearing and saying the word “love” which can often feel a bit too heavy, just integrate the word into sentences, and do it often! For Example, “I love the way I’m feeling with you right now” and “I love being with you” or “I love this”. The more you practice the sooner “I love you” will slip naturally off your tongue!
#3 Make his favourite food
Even if it is a greasy double cheeseburger with potato wedges and a can of beer, do it because you love him. He will appreciate it much more than a fancy three-course meal, and it will convey the fact that you know exactly what he likes, which will make him feel special.
#4 Message him for no other reason than to say you are thinking about him
When done in moderation, a random text or phone message from his girlfriend telling him that he is in her thoughts will be a pleasant surprise and a welcome break in a monotonous day at work. It’ll also put him in the mood to see you later!
#5 Make a joke and have a code word for “love”
Not everybody feels comfortable with the phrase, especially at the beginning of a relationship, so why not take the seriousness down a few notches and play with the idea of saying “I love you” by replacing the phrase with something completely random, like “supercalafragalisticexpialadoshus”. You can both have a giggle every time one of you says it, and you can finish each other’s sentence off, making it a mutual expression of enjoyment and bonding.
#6 Develop pet names for each other
Having pet names doesn’t have to be sickening or cringe worthy if you choose something personal and unique that acts as a kind of secret code language between the two of you. When you call each other by alternative names that you have invented it illustrates that you are special to each other, and it expresses affection. Pet names can be anything from initials, to abbreviations, to descriptive words or phrases. Go with what feels right, and use more than one to express different kinds of love – playful love, romantic love, lusty love…
#7 Post pictures of you both together on Facebook
They don’t have to be soppy pictures mind, but anything that shows you having fun is great. When he sees them he will feel flattered that you want to publicly display the fact that you are together. It’s like a casual form of public affection!
#8 Treat him to dinner and a movie
If you’re in the kind of relationship where he tends to always pick up the bill, show him you care by offering to take him out “on you”. It doesn’t have to be flash or expensive, the thought is what will make him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
#9 Using Love Songs to get the message across
No, I’m not suggesting you make him a mixed tape, that’s somewhat retro. But the next time you’re in the car, the kitchen or a bar and a soppy love ballad comes on, join in and sing the lyrics, playfully directing them at your boyfriend. He will think you’re nuts and you have a laugh over it, but I will also feel like an expression of how you feel, even if you are poking fun at yourself.
#10 Hearts, Hearts and More Hearts…
Hearts are not just for Valentines Day! If you and your man are having trouble with the “L” word, exaggerate by taking advantage of every heart-shaped random prop you can find. Soon “sop” will become a running joke in your relationship and you will both feel even closer to each other because of your ability to take it all light-heartedly. Did you know that you can get heart-shaped egg molds for your fry-up? And an “I heart you” stamp for your toast? Nuts huh? Crazy, but fun, and totally unsubtle!
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