One of the most important things in every relationship or marriage is to be patient. Here’s how to learn patience in a relationship and enjoy your love.
If you have love and patience, you’re all set for a great relationship. Patience is not only vital for a loving relationship but equally important, in the long run, it helps you to be more in control of your life and with that comes a healthier state of mind.
You may like to think you are a patient person, but how often do you lose your temper with your partner? Having patience means not getting angry or upset in stressful and unpleasant situations.
None of us are perfect; we cannot be patient all of the time, but once you understand the importance of patience for a healthy loving relationship, you will be a much more balanced person.
Patience is not something you’re born with; it’s something you acquire over the years, it’s a skill that you can learn and like any skill, you get better at it over the years.
See it as a sort of finesse, a competence worth developing because, in the long run, you’ll become much more serene and more in control over your relationship at home.
Here are three situations that might cause you to experience impatience and prevent you from being gentle and easy going in your loving relationship:
Your partner will no doubt be very hesitant to engage fully the second time around so expect things to be sluggish in the beginning. You find yourself pushing him to cohabit, and you are dying to meet his parents, but he is reluctant.
This does not mean he lacks feelings for you; he just wants to be sure that he doesn’t make the same mistake again. Although it’s frustrating, you have no choice but to be patient for that loving relationship to move forward.
If a child is involved, then you need to be cautious as well as patient when deciding what will make you happy. If this relationship is the most important to you, and you choose to follow through, then you must respect his decision to being a dedicated father. Make sure this is what you want because you will need to be very patient. Here’s why:
–The divorce from his first wife may have been settled amicably but and accept that he will still have to maintain contact with his ex and the child or children they had together. Be patient when he has to spend time with them.
– Most men like a particular type of girl so you may look like his ex. Accept that there might be some similarities and traits between you and his ex but don’t dwell on what these might be. This sort of behavior may make you look immature and insecure.
If he brings it up, instead show how patient you are by listening and making a joke of it, focusing perhaps on one of your strong points: You could ask “Is her stomach as flat as mine? “
You’ve had a hard day at the office; you race home to fix a candlelight dinner because you and your partner had planned dinner for two – a quiet evening at home.
Dinner’s in the oven you set the table, you make sure you are looking your best and all ready for a romantic evening. It’s all ready for 8 o clock, the time he usually gets home, but he doesn’t show up. You try calling, but his phone goes straight to voicemail.
This is to enough for anyone to lose patience, and become angry – Hard as it, reflect for a moment before you storm out of the house and head off to your mom’s or your best friend for the evening.
Don’t forget that you fell in love with this busy guy, this bright young professional who you know has a brilliant future in his new job. He took the time to explain about his demanding job when you first met and what it would mean to his career in the years to come.
His job is important, and he needs to think of his future, this is, after all, a long-term investment.
You need to think of the future rewards and what future you intend to build together. It would be foolish and pathetic to want to pay him back when he comes home.
Just think instead, how comforting it will be for him to find you there when he comes home, how much you will help him to unwind simply by your presence. Your boyfriend has a legitimate reason for this unscheduled overtime at work; it does not mean he doesn’t love you.
What you can do if you are still in the honeymoon stage of your relationship is to be prepared for this sort of situation happening again.
Tell him how infuriating it is to be kept waiting, make sure he understands that you want to support him emotionally but that you have a life too. Turn your impatience to something positive like developing a new hobby and learning a new language.
‘I wish he’d listen to me.’
‘Why doesn’t he take more care of his body’?
‘Why does he have to stay up so late watching television?’
What you’re doing here is judging your partner negatively, focusing on the destructive rather than the constructive. Because you lack patience, you start an argument determined that you are right and that he should be doing exactly as you want him to do. You have to win the argument so you explode just like a pressure cooker.
Remember, though, that each person has the right to his own point of view, and most important you are each on your own path of development. This means you have no right to tell him how he should be running his life if he needs to unwind by watching television and then let him. Give him his space.
What you should be doing instead is focusing on his good points, his kindness, his loyalty and his love for you. Try to be kind and gentle yourself and remember that patience will help your partner feel secure, vital for the future of your loving relationship.
Patience is vital for a loving relationship because of the long term benefits. Admittedly, it takes time, but once you learn about developing patience skills, you become a happier person.
This is what happens with increased patience:
— You become much more patient with yourself: with this new confidence, you create harmony in yourself which eventually will radiate more love and peace around you.
— Patience is vital not only for a loving relationship but also in a work situation where you might be called upon to be a team leader. Patience will empower you to build strong relationships with workmates. See patience as an investment for the future.
— You become a healthier person. When you become impatience, snap and lose your temper, the body reacts in a negative way: you may experience shortness of breath, your body becomes tense.
So, If your best friend tells you you’ve got a short fuse, listen up, she’s probably right, you lack patience, and this can have serious consequences on your relationship, whether you’ve just started dating a new guy or are already in a long term relationship.
In other words, if you can develop patience, so vital for daily life, you are on your way to power. This peaceful virtue not only makes a love relationship stronger but it also helps you achieve your personal and professional goals.
Alice Alech is a writer and author based in France. She is keen to promote good healthy living and writes on nutrition, wine, food, and lifestyle. She is a coauthor of the book 7 Wonders of Olive Oil.
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