If you’re feeling tired, physically and emotionally exhausted, because you are trying to completely devote yourself to your baby – breast-feeding, and other new responsibilities – it’s natural that sex is one of the last things on your mind. But what if your husband wants intimacy and sex? How to explain that full sexual intercourse has now become something you’re even a little bit afraid of? How to get over it?
First, you need to know what to expect, which will make it easier for you to give it a try.
Sex after pregnancy is possible and should happen naturally! According to doctors opinion women’s body needs to heel after giving birth whether the baby was delivered vaginally or by Cesarean section.
The recommendation is to wait 4-6 weeks until postpartum bleeding stops, repaired lacerations are healed, your cervix is closed , and your body feels ready for sex ( it can be a few weeks, months or even longer, it varies from woman to woman). Even if you haven’t had an episiotomy or a tear, the perianal area can feel sensitive for some time. So, let the wound heal and the stitches dissolve before you decide to have sex.
For women who are breast-feeding, vagina can be dry or tender and having sex can cause discomfort or even be painful.
Talk with your partner about controlling penetration force and think about trying different positions. The usual advice is to start slowly with kissing, cuddling or stimulation and use a lubricating cream or gel. Sometimes a low dose of estrogen cream can be applied to the vagina to help out the situation. If nothing helps and sex remains painful, you should consult your health care provider.
Here are some common questions women have about having sex after pregnancy, and the answers that will help you out if you are struggling.
Q: Will sex after giving birth be different?
A: If muscle tone in the vagina is decreased after a vaginal delivery the sexual pleasure may be temporarily reduced. Women are advised to do Kegel exercises after vaginal delivery.
Q: How to do Kegel exercises?
A: Very simply. Tighten your pelvic muscles as if you are trying to stop while urinating. Do it for 5 seconds at a time, 4-5 times in a row. Keep the muscles contracted for 10 seconds at a time, relaxing for 10 seconds between contractions. Do at least 3 sets of 10 every day.
Q: When is the right moment to begin to have sex again?
A: After your GP gives you the go-ahead sign at your six-week postpartum check, although you can’t make a mistake if you have sex before your visit to the doctor. If you had any problems during sex you can discuss them with the doctor.
It’s very important that you communicate with your partner. Some women report that their libido is low after giving birth and they don’t feel sexy. Another problem is that if you do not want sex your partner might feel rejected.
Talk to your partner and try and make him see that in this period, sex without penetration can also be pleasurable. In the first few weeks cuddling, kissing and getting used to be touched in a sexual way lead to sexual pleasure.