Living together with your partner is a big step no matter how long you and your partner have been together for, what the two of you are like, and what your future plans are. No matter what, it is a big decision and step which requires lots of thought, commitment, dedication, love, and planning.
However, once you and your partner discuss your future plans for your individual selves and for your relationship, talk about money, any issues, new plans, and decisions. This choice seems like a very easy one to do. That is until you are living there and are thrown into a completely new environment.
There is a big difference between sleepovers at a partner’s house or just always going there, and living together. By setting some ground rules you will easily be able to live cohesively, and in a fun and exciting way that will not hinder your relationship.
Ground rules might sound like the pre-school classroom rules, or like you both are drill sergeants. However, if you do them by coming from a place of love, and by making them as a couple, it is something that can only be good.
When making these rules, consider them as guidelines which will help make this transition run smoothly and perfectly for you and your partner. After all, it is being tailor made by the people it is meant for. Additionally, make sure that when you do make these together, you both remain calm, rational, logical, and are very kind.
Read on to learn some of the best rules to live by for when you live together, that you should never break!
Chores should be something that is split between the two of you. We live in the year of 2017, and although women are still seen as the chore doers through stereotypes, this is not the reality. By making this one of the rules to live by for when you live together, you and your partner will find that you have less to do because the workload is shared.
You will also find that whoever may be assumed to do all of the chores from the get go, will not grow to resent the person who does none of the chores. As well, if you both do the chores and your fair share of the work, you will find that the two of you will have more time to do other things you want, and will be happier.
An important thing to note here is that if your partner is sick and not well, it is best to do their chores for their period of sickness as it is something that they should also do for you. Additionally, when choosing who does what chores, you should both have a say in that based off of your preferences and skills. Just keep in mind no one likes cleaning bathrooms so you might want to alternate turns for that one.
Never go to bed angry
If you listen to at least a few of these guidelines that are mentioned in this article, let this be one of them. You should never go to bed angry at your partner, and they should never go to bed angry at you.
The reason why for this is simple, you never know what can happen the next day. Also, as much time and energy as arguments take, and no matter how tired you are, you should never take a break to sleep and then resume.
If you go to sleep angry, you will both wake up even angrier. You will even wake up more resentful because your partner didn’t do something they usually do (a kiss, snuggle, hug, “I love you”, or anything else), apologize, or just because of the fight.
What you should do if you and your partner are having a fight is to resolve it fully, communicate effectively, and get back to your version of normal. This way you can both go to bed happier, without any emotional baggage, and will be healthier.
It doesn't matter if you have work the next day and are up talking until 5 AM. What matters is that the person you love and you are having an issue; you are both sad, angry, upset, and many other emotions.
The last thing you both need is to have time to fester, become even more upset, and to over think. What you do need is to relax, calm down, be happy together, resolve this issue, and show your love for each other.
As much as decorating may be something one of you loves, and something one of you hates. You both still need to decorate together. Everyone has different tastes in terms of decorating, and as much as you may love your partner, you still may not love their taste.
As well, it is also your home and you deserve to feel like it is your home. Meaning you need to have a say in this and take part. Not to mention, this will also be lots of fun for you and your partner to do together.
Have a safe word
As kinky as that may sound, it actually isn’t. You and your partner should both come up with a word that not only will you both remember, but also respect. That way when you are both doing pranks, tickle wars, jokes, or messing around you may need to say this word.
For this to work, once you say this word, your partner must respect it and immediately stop. However, you also can not overuse it.
Do “you” things
Although you are living with your partner and doing basically everything with them, you also need to still do “you” things. As much as you love being with them and doing everything together, there are some things that you have to do on your own that are for yourself.
However, if “you” thing is something that you can also do with your partner and you want to do it that way, you also can go ahead and do it together.
Just remember that for some people they require some space to do their own things at some points too.
One of the most important rules to live by is to communicate with your partner effectively. By doing this, you will be able to have an honest, open, and successful communication channel. This way you and your partner will find that your relationship is thriving because you tell each other everything and are able to communicate so well.
Meaning, if something is bothering you, stressing you out, or making you worry, you need to tell your partner. You also can’t bottle anything up or else you will burst with anger and resentment at some point and that is not healthy for you, your partner, or your relationship.
Keep the romance and quality time alive
Just because you and your partner are living together, it doesn’t mean that you need to stop showing your partner that you love them. Even the smallest signs of love, affection, desire, or sweetness are still important.
Meaning you both need to remember to plan dates, surprise each other, show those small and big amazing gestures of love, and also make lots of time for each other.
Although you may be thinking that since you live together you don’t need to make time for them that is far from the truth. Just because you see them at home, it doesn’t mean that you should not make sure that there is more to it than that.
So keep the romance alive, plan dates, and make sure you make enough time to also get intimate, share laughs, make memories, and appreciate and love each other by going out.
When making rules to live by for when you live together, you should remember to make these rules ones that you can both easily live with, function with, and are happy with. They need to resemble the relationship you both have, and plan on having.
Another important rule for when you live together is to both make sure that you have lots of fun together as you start the next chapter in your lives together.
Good luck, and enjoy this new chapter of love and excitement. If you can think of any other suggestions for rules to live by for when you live together, feel free to share!