The majority of individuals know that adultery is wrong and can feel it when temptation strikes, but some still do it. Although it’s a normal part of human nature to find another human being attractive even though you’re committed to your partner, you still have the choice of whether or not you’re going to follow through with the urge.
Some realize that whatever may happen can’t be undone, and for some, the temptation to cheat is too overwhelming – in which case an opportunity presents itself and cheating is the consequence.
Whether you’re in a new relationship or have a fully-functioning, established family, adultery can happen to anyone. Unless you believe strongly in the fact that cheating is an absolute no-no when you’re involved in a relationship or marriage, you may find yourself confronting a very sticky situation of cheating on your partner.
We asked an expert’s advice on how to resist the temptation of cheating, to protect yourself and your relationship from disaster. Chances are, if you’re reading this, you may already have been confronted with a taste of it.
Here’s how you can resist the temptation of cheating on your partner:
1. Think it through thoroughly
When you find yourself in the situation of whether or not you’re going to go down the cheating route, always take a moment to think it through thoroughly.
Often times, thinking goes out the door when confronted with urges. One of the best ways to separate your urges from the actual act of cheating is to add some thinking time into the mix. Try it the next time you find yourself in a tricky situation.
2. Phone a supportive friend
It’s important to have someone on hand that you can trust. Someone who isn’t judgemental, who will be available to talk about the situation without blabbing it to anyone. Most importantly, your partner.
Even though you should have a conversation with your partner as soon as you find yourself feeling tempted to cheat, it should definitely only come from you. Find a supportive friend who can offer external advice.
3. Remember the consequences
There will always a reaction to every action, whether positive or negative. Remember that the next time you find yourself in the situation of choosing whether or not you’re going to cheat.
As an adult, you have to be willing to face the consequences, whatever they may be. It could be that you live with the guilt forever or lose your partner’s trust in the process.
4. Be open with your partner
Open communication is key to solving any problem – regardless of the severity. Always be open with your partner about your needs, your urges, and most importantly, the instant when cheating becomes a small thought.
It’s a sign that something needs to change within your relationship, soon. Otherwise, you may end up in a situation that you’ll regret forever – especially if children are involved. Always consider the wellbeing of your children when finding out how to resist the temptation to cheat.
5. Avoid the situation at all costs
There are times when you have to remove yourself from a situation in order to prevent adultery taking place. Whether it’s from an office setting or a specific place you like to hang out.
You don’t have to stay in a situation if you’re not completely comfortable with the fact that you may not cheat. We all have choices in life, and when it comes to cheating, you have to take responsibility for your actions by choosing which situations you’re going to stay in.
6. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes
If you had to switch roles, how do you think you’d feel if you found out your partner had cheated and kept it from you? It’s an extremely important thought to keep in mind when the opportunity presents itself.
Often, putting yourself in a loved one’s shoes is the best way to walk away from adultery, if you love and respect your partner enough. We all make mistakes, but removing yourself from the situation can save you a lot of heartaches.
7. Remember why your love your partner
In the beginning, when you first started dating your partner, the thought of cheating never crossed your mind. There were certain qualities and values your partner presented that kept you interested otherwise you wouldn’t have started the relationship in the first place.
When the thought of cheating first crosses your mind, remind yourself why you love your partner. Often, we take our loved ones for granted. They’re always there so why care, right?
8. Initiate intimacy more often
If sex is the issue, speak to your partner about it and initiate quality intimacy time more often. It may be that your partner isn’t even aware that you have a problem with sex within the relationship.
Open communication is key as previously explained. It may be that your partner feels the same, in which case, a simple misunderstanding can easily be resolved. Always remember, love may not always be enough, but it sure helps.
9. Share everything with your partner
Don’t hide messages, conversation, or even friends from your partner. The minute you feel the need to keep any information to yourself, that’s when you should start worrying that cheating can possibly become a real problem.
Be open with the person you’re choosing to share your life. That way, you don’t have to remember what to say or which things to hide.
Besides, the #1 rule when figuring out how to resist the temptation to cheat is to be open about it.
10. Masturbate more regularly
You may have a higher sex drive than your partner, so initiating sex more often isn’t the answer. You have to be able to respect that and find other ways of getting rid of some of your urges.
Why not try masturbating. Not only is it healthy for you, it’s healthy for your relationship – keeping you from finding sex elsewhere. You may say that it’s not enough, though. Just remember, sex is easy to find, but love doesn’t come around often. So rather keep what you have and spend more time with yourself.
Bonus tip: Break up with your partner
Most importantly, if you find yourself in the situation of possibly cheating, it may be time to re-evaluate your relationship to see if it’s really worth it.
You don’t want to cheat your partner out of finding someone who will appreciate him/her fully and stay faithful, but you also don’t want to cheat yourself out of staying with someone that you don’t love enough to be faithful with.
It may be a good time to have ‘the talk’ and decide, together, if staying together is best for both of you. The idea of cheating can easily grow into an action if you don’t take care of the thought immediately.
Rather break up with your partner before you decide to cheat if you think you actually will. It’s only the right thing to do.
When finding tips on how to resist the temptation to cheat, the most important thing to remember is all the efforts you’ve put into your current relationship and how easy you’re willing to give it all up.
Remember, the truth always comes out one way or another, so it’s best to have ‘the conversation’ with your partner first before anything else happens. You do have the choice to say no. You don’t have to give into cheating as if it has control over your urges.
Remember why you started the relationship with your current and evaluate whether or not those elements still exist before going down a road you simply can’t recover from.
Rather go your separate ways first before causing irreparable damage to a relationship and another individual. When trying to figure out how to resist the temptation to cheat, always take into consideration the above-mentioned tips – saving unnecessary heartache all round.