Relationships

How To Save A Relationship Before It’s Too Late

Do you feel like your relationship has been different lately? Do you feel distant from your partner? Learn how to save a relationship that needs a bit of fixing.

It should be said though that every relationship has its natural ebb and flow when things are either great or perhaps have gotten a little strained.

However, if the balance has been off center for some time now it might be time to consider your next move to ensure you are able to save your relationship in the long run.

Here we discuss some of the steps you may wish to take in order to learn how to save a relationship that you're in, before it's too late.

Get back to basics

couple dancing in the kitchen and smiling

It's not realistic (nor practical!) to maintain the level of excitement you had when you first got together but your relationship should still feel like a fun and positive addition to both of your lives at least most of the time. It's all about regaining that balance and taking the time to realize why you are together and how you both make each other's lives more enriched.

Just like bread that's been sitting out for a while now relationships can also get a little stale if we begin to neglect them. It's a good idea to re-evaluate the reasons why you are together and what first attracted you to each other in the first place.

As crazy as it seems sometimes life can get in the way and we can forget the special things we really should cherish, not to mention how easy it is to take each other for granted.

Whilst it's no bad thing to become comfortable with each other, it can be a sure fire way to neglect the spark that ignited the passion in the first place if it becomes your norm.

You can overcome this by doing things which celebrate your relationship and keep it exciting such as going on a Date Night or even spontaneous trips away.

Also, don't forget the little things such as paying each other compliments or being thoughtful and caring towards each other.

Take time out

Absence makes the heart grow fonder but it can also be a great tool to give you both breathing space to re-evaluate your feelings and figure out how issues can be worked through.

Having activities outside the relationship such as going to the gym can give you a new perspective and also help you channel negative energy in a more positive light.

Sometimes, you just need time away from each other to realize things you cannot see when in the heat of an argument or if one or both partners have become distant.

Just like life can be stressful, our relationships can also become strained especially with the ones closest to us. There are times when a break either for the weekend spent with friends instead or maybe for an agreed time with no contact can really help re-evaluate the important things.

If you do take a relationship break, it's a good idea to use this time to think about where things started to take a nosedive so you can avoid similar sticking points in the future. It takes compassion, understanding, and maturity to truly work through things for good so keep this in mind.

Don't bottle it up

couple talking on the couch

Naturally, we all communicate differently and some of us have an easier time than others at expressing how we feel about certain issues. It's important that you take the time to talk through things that may be bothering you honestly and openly. Equally, you must also honor the same for the other person to ensure you are both heard and are communicating effectively.

If you want to save your relationship and keep it healthy, then you must realize how important it is to open up and not criticize the other person for doing so. Sometimes it requires a compromise from both parties but most importantly an understanding ear.

If you can both have an adult conversation and be able to work on the issues raised it will ultimately strengthen what you have, because it will show you are both just as committed to each other even when things have gotten a little rough. However, keeping things from your partner such as why you are unhappy will only store up trouble for the future as it will prevent them from being able to address the issues with you.

Be clear about your needs

Whatever the issue is threatening your relationship, if you really want to save it then you need to have a clear understanding of what is lacking.

We might spend a whole lot of time with our significant other but that doesn't mean we become mind readers. Think about it, how easy is it to misjudge something and make the other person frustrated?

Perhaps you are feeling neglected because of your partner's work schedule, or maybe you are struggling to adapt as a couple after having children.

Sometimes life throws up some huge adjustments and it's important our own needs don't get left behind in the process. Whilst things sometimes have to change, it doesn't mean you as a couple should get left behind too.

Set aside some time to talk things through and if it helps make a list of the issues you are most troubled by and get the other person to do the same. It might take some understanding from both parties, but at least if you are both clear you can work out a way to move past your difficulties. If something is worth saving you need to accept each other's needs and embrace them in order to move forward.

Consider couples therapy

couple talking on the couch

Granted, it might not be what you ever imagined things would resort to when you first fell in love but talking to a neutral third party can help you gain a whole lot of perspective. Therapy encourages you to listen and take stock of how the other person is feeling in a non-judgemental environment.

It is something you may want to consider if you are married or children are involved, but also if there has been a difficult issue or loss that has greatly effected your communication which you have so far been unable to get past.

Even having the other party agree to attend therapy is a huge positive as it shows commitment, and is surely one of the key building blocks of any relationship.

Therapy has helped many couples work through their issues and indeed help prevent future ones from arising. Sometimes we have to open up to the difficult sticking points that are preventing our relationship from being a smooth one.

Only when we tackle these difficulties can we truly free up the emotional blockage. Having someone guide this conversation and ask the right questions can help mend bridges and ultimately save your relationship if other methods up to now have failed to do so.

Be a team player

Whatever route you choose to save your relationship, you have to remember that there is no “I” in “team” and a team is exactly what you are – even if it doesn't feel like it right now.

You have to find a way to nourish what you have to make it strong and be able to work things through when difficult patches arise as they inevitably will in this journey we call life.

Put yourself in each other's shoes and show compassion and understanding, and be upfront with your emotions in a way which will encourage positivity so you can both move forward.

The most important thing to remember is that in order to save your relationship it has to be a team effort 100% of the way. There is not just you in the relationship there is another person and vice versa.

You chose to become one but there is still two of you with needs both emotionally and physically so it's up to both of you to full fill these and work at it to remain strong, happy and healthy.

About the author

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Rachael OFlaherty

I am a beauty blogger and Youtuber. My goal is to encourage confidence within fairer skintone as I believe all skintones are beautiful and should be embraced. Outside of this I work as a Graphic Designer having graduated in 2012 and I also work part time on beauty and fragrance counters.

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