Confidence is something that is created. We are constantly put against ourselves in terms of how confident we are allowed to feel based on how closely we match society’s standards of beauty.
It can be difficult at times to feel as confident as we should as a result, but we also understand that, at the end of the day, our self-worth is solely in our hands. Here is what we go through to learn just that.
1. We weren’t always this confident
Even though we don’t like to remember the times when we felt less than what we should, we will never lie and say that those times in our lives didn’t mean something. We know what it feels like not to have confidence.
We know what it’s like not to be happy with ourselves. That’s why we value ourselves now the way that we do. We know what it’s like not to have it, so we do what we can to make sure that it never happens again.
2. We have off days
A lot of work went into our newfound feelings about ourselves. There were plenty of off-days and days where we felt on top of the world. That’s normal. We understand that it happens to everyone. We aren’t going to be happy with ourselves 100% of the time. We wish we could, but it’s not realistic. We are all human.
3. We still feel self-conscious
We aren’t superhuman. Just because we are confident now doesn’t mean that we don’t still feel self-conscious at times as well. There is no way to escape the feeling of not being our best or not looking or feeling as good as you can. There is always going to be times when we feel like we aren’t as good as someone else or that we don’t deserve what we have. It’s all a part of life.
We have grown to understand that we aren’t perfect and that no one expects us to be—beside ourselves perhaps. We understand that there is always going to be someone who is prettier than us, smarter than us or better at something than we are. We also understand that there is nothing wrong with that.
4. We had to learn who we are
Everyone has to find themselves in some way. No one exists knowing exactly what their purpose is, where they’re going to be in 10 years or who they want to be as a human being.
The only way you’re going to learn who you are is if you go out and try to figure it out. You have to go out and try new things, see what you’re good at, what you’re not good at and what you can handle. These things don’t come easy, and they never will. They’re not supposed to and, honestly, that’s half the fun.
To learn who you are, you have to move outside your comfort zone. That’s where a lot of confidence comes from. It doesn’t come from thin air or overnight. It’s a process. It’s a journey if you make it one. Just make sure that it’s one you enjoy being a part of.
Confidence comes from not knowing what you’re doing and doing it anyway. It’s normal to be afraid, but nothing is permanent. You can always find your way back home, and you can always start over if you want something badly enough. Confidence should always be something to want badly. It’s something that can help you get through life, get a job or whatever you want to do.
5. We still don’t always know what we want
Yes, confident people have a tendency to be stubborn when it comes to something that they want. When we do know what we want, there is not much that can get in our way of having it.
Something that needs to be said is that confidence should not be confused with cockiness. People who are cocky try to get what they want because they think they deserve it. Cocky people also usually don’t do anything to deserve what they want. Confident people work as hard as they can to get what they want.
However, we don’t always know what we want. There is a large part of us that does something just to see what happens. There is no reason why we do certain things, and there doesn’t have to be.
We know that we don’t have to have everything figured out every moment of our lives. It’s okay not to know what you’re doing or what you want at a specific moment in time.
Confidence is something that is earned. Not only because of societal standards, but also because confident people had to work to get where they are today.
They’re the first people to tell you that they aren’t perfect, and they’re the first to tell you when they don’t like something. Confidence doesn’t come easy, and some of us are still trying to break the surface.
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