Just like a garden needs soil, water, and the sun, your relationship requires hard work, care, and attention.
When you put the right practices into place, your relationship becomes stronger, healthier, and more vibrant. Even just improving in a few areas like communication and problem-solving can enhance your love life leaps and bounds.
That’s why we’re bringing you healthy relationship hacks that can transform your relationship.
These love hacks aren’t a quick fix either. The insights we share are lasting. If you put them into action, your relationship will be stronger for years to come.
Unlike other posts, like Reddit relationship hacks, our list gives you long-term solutions and tips for relationship issues.
We include romantic hacks, life hacks for couples, and the simplest of gestures. Even if you’re not currently in a relationship, these tricks and tips will set you up for future success.
We are excited to share with you these 7 healthy relationship hacks!
Relationship Hack #1: Apologize genuinely and be specific
You can usually tell when you’re receiving an apology that isn’t heartfelt. When this happens, it feels like the other person doesn’t understand why you’re upset or what they’re apologizing for.
When this happens, the fight often continues because although an apology has been offered, it doesn’t get to the bottom of whatever is bothering you. Because of this, forgiveness and healing don't happen until a better apology is made.
That’s why it’s most effective to be genuine and specific when offering an apology to your partner. When you’re apologizing, state why you are sorry and what you’re sorry for.
By sharing these details, you’re telling your partner you understand their side of the story and that you truly care about how they feel. It’s best to avoid justifying why you did something or why you said something hurtful. When you rationalize your actions or words, you take value away from your apology.
Once you’ve offered a heartfelt and detailed apology, communication opens back up because respect has been re-established between the couple. This genuine apology love hack can make all of the difference.
Relationship Hack #2: Remember you’re on the same team
While it may seem natural and obvious that a couple would be on the same team, it’s usually exceptionally hard to practice. Even when my husband gives me simple feedback, I can begin to think that we are on separate teams. Deep down I know he wants the best for me, but it’s hard to see that when he’s offering me a critique – no matter how small.
When you’re giving feedback to your partner, keep in mind that you’re on the same team. In times when your partner becomes defensive, you may even choose to say, “I’m on your side.” or “We are on the same team.” Saying these words out loud is a relationship hack that reminds you both that above all, you love each other and want to help each other be happy.
Remembering you’re on the same team is helpful when you’re receiving feedback from your partner, too. Rather than taking it personally or becoming defensive, you can remember that your partner wants the best for you and is on your side.
If you live far away from your partner, know that being on the same team is a crucial long distance relationship hack. When you’re not physically close to each other, partners can begin to think they are on separate teams. Remind yourself and your partner that you’re in this together.
When your mindset changes from being on separate teams to the same team, you’ll be able to listen to your partner more fully and work together toward your common relationship goals.
Relationship Hack #3: Do the little things
A happy and healthy relationship doesn’t mean you always need to do grand romantic gestures for each other. Sometimes it is the smallest things that go the farthest and make the biggest difference in a relationship.
My husband, for example, appreciates it when I make the bed in the morning. Even though it makes no difference to me, it’s important to him. When I take the time to make the bed, he feels cared for and valued. A task like that is small but carries big weight.
Relationships are happier and healthier when we do even the littlest things for our partners.
Take mental notes of what your significant other especially appreciates. Is it a chore around the house? Is it tiny, thoughtful gifts or notes? Is it a kiss when they walk in the door?
Figure out little things you can do to make them feel loved and cared for. When you try this romantic hack, extra love and passion will enter your relationship.
Relationship Hack #4: Make good communication a priority
In a strong relationship, both partners communicate openly, honestly, and frequently. Conversations, feelings, and plans are discussed regularly in order to make sure the couple stays on the same page.
But communication doesn’t just happen. It must be made a priority – no matter what else you have going on in your life. If you’re spending lots of time at work or with friends, still carve out time to talk with your partner and communicate about important life happenings and to-dos. Staying connected builds togetherness and trust.
While good communication is certainly a love hack for all relationships, it’s especially helpful for long distance relationships. For couples that don’t live close to each other, especially those in different time zones, set a certain time that you’ll talk to each other every day or every week. This long distance relationship hack will keep you feeling constantly connected.
By devoting time to communication, your bond will strengthen and future issues will be prevented because you’re on the same page.
Relationship Hack #5: Don’t let emotion overcome you during an argument
During an argument, the emotional side of our brain can take over, and we lose our rationality. Once our feelings are hurt, we can easily hit a downward spiral of anger, sadness, and misunderstanding.
If you try to separate yourself from the emotion, you can calm yourself during an argument and engage in a healthy conversation instead.
As Eckhart Toll shares in his world famous book, The Power of Now, if you observe the emotion as separate from yourself, “You can then allow the emotion to be there without being controlled by it. You no longer are the emotion; you are the watcher.”
When you’re able to detach from emotion during an argument, you become in control of your own words and actions. You and your partner can then communicate openly, as yourselves, instead of being controlled by initial emotional reactions.
Relationship Hack #6: Conduct a ‘relationship performance review’
Every few months or once a year, do a relationship performance review. Make it fun by asking questions about your relationship at dinner or over a glass of wine. Use questions such as, “What was your favorite thing we did together this fall?” or “What’s one place you’d like to travel in the next year together?”
You can also ask more in-depth questions about your relationship, like, “How are things going for you? Is there anything that needs to be changed or adjusted? I want to make sure I’m being the best partner for you.”
This open communication gives both people a chance to voice how they’re feeling and tweak things along the way.
Rather than letting issues build up, you’re communicating openly, helping to avoid future problems or miscommunications. Having these types of review conversations ensures your relationship will be smooth sailing in the months and years ahead.
Relationship Hack #7: Mix things up
Every relationship benefits from a little switch-up. Whether it’s in the bedroom or in your weekend activities, try doing new things with your partner. Schedule a Saturday hiking adventure or plan to see a show at the local theater.
When you mix things up, you freshen your relationship. These new activities also offer the opportunity to make special memories together.
Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Ph.D. and professor at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, states that new shared experiences prompt “growing and enduring connections.” She also shares that memories and “time spent together isolated from ordinary everyday activities help to promote positive ties.”
Whatever new thing you decide to do, know that it will add an extra punch to your relationship, making your bond stronger and sexier.
Which of these girlfriend hacks will you put into action this week? Are there any love hacks we missed? Tell us in the comments below!