Dating can be an exciting time at first. As you discover that each date ends in unpleasant or disappointing circumstances, negativity fills the heart. Don’t get discouraged.
The happiness shown in movies does exist, but it takes more persistence to find. Toss your jaded feelings to the side and channel positivity. These tips will show you how.
It’s time for a reality check
TV shows, books, movies and positive stories show us that true love exists. Unlike in movies, the love of your life doesn’t arrive in an unexpected manner. Stop dreaming.
Reality is nothing like Hollywood. Several people may come your way before you meet the right person, so mingle and engage here and now. Read books and stories related to dating advice from a man’s perspective. Failed relationships prepare you to find the right person.
It’s about selection, not rejection
How can some women find love and others can’t? It’s all about selection. Those women know what they want. Their standards are high and they will not yield for anything less. Specifically, they strategize.
Their plan of action includes desires, expectations, deal-breakers and boundaries. Their pace is slow, and they don’t let anyone talk them into grabbing someone because the family or friends approve. Selection makes you positive because you won’t settle.
Likewise, extreme selectivity is why some can’t find dates. Examples of this include listing a certain height, hair color or income—the unrealistic standards eliminate too many people. A superhero doesn’t exist.
The average person won’t cater to you every second of the day, and no single person will meet all 200 requirements on your list. Return to earth with realistic expectations for men.
Shake it off
Since dating is selection, shake off bad dates. Easier said than done, right? Ladies, we take bad dates personally. You tried to compromise, but it doesn’t work well with everyone, so you let go.
Don’t let bad dates consume you. Move on to the next date, concentrate on errands, listen to music or cry it out with family and friends. Get the moody funk out.
In return, never take bad moods to a dating scene. It turns the mood sour before it gets going, and a potential mate is gone because of the bad day. Therefore, shake off any frustrations that may have occurred during the day prior to the date.
Get a life
Is the dating world your whole life or part of it? Enjoy life. Make money at work, hang out with friends, chat with family, browse social media, enjoy nature, exercise, find a hobby and run errands. Bills are due and chores are incomplete. Life doesn’t revolve around finding a significant other.
Think outside the box
In Hollywood, it takes one meaty role to break away from the typecast box. In the dating world, it’s easy to remain complacent. Break stereotyping by breaking your habits. Find dates in a different venue.
Dress differently (remain respectful). Date a different type of person. This person will still meet the standards but have different interests. Try a different activity on the date. Break the standards mentally set by you and go in a different direction.
Leave temporarily
The dating world becomes overwhelming when we expect the world immediately. An alternative instance is being frustrated with attracting the same kind of person. If the dating world is burning you out, leave.
Set a beginning and end during the temporary vacation. Make yourself happy with a bubble bath, massage, or doing your favorite hobby. However, during that time, analyze yourself.
What are you doing to attract these kinds of people? If you can’t analyze your behavior, your family and friends will. The responses will hurt, but if you listen to the message and not voice tone, you can rebound with a renewed purpose.
Rediscover purpose
What is the reason for plunging into the dating scene? An unsatisfactory answer is ‘to find a lover.’ ‘To feel complete’ is wrong because you can be complete on your own.
Dig deeper for the answer. Channel your personality and emotion for answers. Consider the benefits of companionship to solve the mystery. Why is it important? How does that answer transform your life?
Dating is a journey. Each date is a learning lesson about expectations, toleration and limitations. A failed relationship isn’t the end; it’s the beginning. Use failed relationships as a guide.
Become selective. If selection overrides desperation and people pleasing, we will find happiness. In turn, women need to become open-minded. Shutting out people due to appearance or for materialistic reasons means you’re skipping someone who could be the one for you.
Does your dating life need positive reinforcement? Do the positive tips do the trick? Let’s talk about it. Share your experiences below and don’t forget to share this across your social media channels.
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