Why Changing Yourself For A Relationship Can Be A Good Thing

You should definitely love your single girl life (and you probably do). But, when you find love, you should consider changing yourself for a relationship.

I’ve been single for a while now and it’s no secret to anyone that knows me that I absolutely love my life. I enjoy every day and try not to dwell too much on the fact that I don’t have a guy in my world.

But being single comes with a lot of baggage, and that means that once I do meet the right person, I’m going to have to say goodbye to a big chunk of my routine. I know I have to think about what to give up and what to hold onto once I find love.

It’s pretty common to be afraid for things to change, but there’s zero fear here. I’m ready and willing to make these changes… as long as the guy’s worth it, of course. Here are 10 things I actually would change for the right guy and why you should consider changing yourself for a relationship as well.

1) My working weekends

 changing yourself for a relationship

I work for myself and to say that I love my career would be a huge understatement. I couldn’t imagine taking the entire weekend off, week after week.

But for someone that I cared about and wanted to build a future with, I would stop working on the weekends (when it’s possible, of course). I would understand that in order for things to work out, we’d have to actually spend time together, and that going to Sunday brunch or a Saturday afternoon movie with my boyfriend is a really good idea.

2) My homebody nature

I don’t hate traveling, but I don’t exactly love it, either. I’m not an adventurous soul who wants to travel the globe and see every single city, country, and continent. I’m more interested in focusing on my career right now than exploring far-off places.

But for the right person, I’d find some wanderlust that I never knew existed and travel with him. I wouldn’t want to miss out on that shared experience and I would be super sad about him going somewhere amazing without me.

3) My decision to have kids

Sure, right now I want kids… in some magical land called the future that will never really get here. I don’t believe in dumping the right guy just because he doesn’t want to start a family.

I can give up that dream for true love because hey, it’s hard enough to meet a guy that you actually get along with. It’s hard enough to find a second date these days. It seems kind of silly to drop someone because they want something different from me.

Love is all about compromise, right? Life is full of so many surprising moments and twists and turns that planning for something like children seems impossible. I’m okay to sit back and let my life play out the way that it’s supposed to.

4) My pop culture pickiness

 changing yourself for a relationship

I’m a self-proclaimed TV addict and pretty proud of it, too. No shame here. But that also means that I’m super stubborn about what I watch. I’m cool with anything from the latest Netflix drama like Stranger Things to The Real Housewives to sweet teen dramas like The Fosters. But there are certain shows that don’t hold much interest for me at all.

Once I start Netflix and chilling with the right guy, I wouldn’t be so picky. He can totally choose the entertainment (well, not every single night…). It seems silly to fight about something like TV choices when there are so many other things to think about in this life.

5) My worrying nature

I worry about a lot of things, even things that don’t need to be thought about so much. It’s just the way I’m wired.

Finding a good guy would definitely eliminate a lot of my worry time. I would be too busy hanging out with him and I wouldn’t be spending so much time alone with my thoughts, ready to freak out about all sorts of stuff. There’s also the fact that although I’m pretty confident, having a boyfriend would be a great support system.

6) My organization obsession

I’ve always been a super organized person. I got good grades and color-coded my notes and still do that to this day with my work agenda.

I’m the planner in my friend group and tend to do that with guys, too. But I would definitely change that for the right guy and let things happen as they happen. I would even sit back and wait until the last minute to make plans… and that’s saying something.

7) My hatred of selfies

 changing yourself for a relationship

I don’t take selfies. Ever. Okay, maybe once but that’s it.

For the right guy, I would totally drink the couple selfie Kool-Aid and join the masses. It might even be fun. It wouldn’t be too prove to my social media world that I have a boyfriend or anything like that. It would just be nice to have that experience together.

8) My judgment

It’s not that I’m a crazy judgmental person, but being single makes it so much easier to think that other people are dating wrong or that happy couples I know aren’t really that happy.

Once I start dating someone new, I can stop that judgment forever and think hey, live and let live.

9) My expectations

Like any woman, I have certain ideas about what makes a good relationship and the way that things should progress.

I’m willing to throw that out the window and just let my new romance unfold naturally, the way it’s supposed to. Can’t be Type A about these things forever. Every relationship is its own thing and everyone is different. I don’t know everything about what’s going to happen to me (although it would be pretty cool if that was the case), so I might as well stop expecting things to work out a certain way.

10) My neighborhood

I’m pretty attached to where I live. I’ve got a great apartment, a local barre studio, and about a million places to buy groceries.

For the right guy, I’m willing to change all that… as long as the new area is just as awesome. Hey, you can’t give up everything.

Are you single and thinking about how your life will change when you get into a new relationship? What are some things you’re willing to give up? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!

About the author

Aya Tsintziras

Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor. She loves coffee, barre classes, 90s television and pop culture. She is a food blogger at A Healthy Story and shares gluten-free, dairy-free recipes and personal stories.

Add Comment

Click here to post a comment