There are certain things that many women do that can irritate and drive men crazy, Avoid them. YouQueen has the answers.
While we would all like to think that every word we speak and every action we take is met with a combination of ardent fervor and unbridled reverence, the reality is that there are probably (read: definitely) things you do that really, truly irritate him.
So to help keep the peace in your relationship and get you back into his good graces, we have identified the top nine things you do that drive him crazy.
First up was something we all expected … they call it nagging. We call it ‘gently reminding’. Pot-ay-to, pot-ar-to. But whatever name you give it, if you’re gently reminding them of something, in their eyes you’re nagging them. Which, you know it, drives them crazy.
So, what’s a girl to do? There are a stack of his dirty dishes in the sink, you’ve nearly fallen in the toilet (again) because he’s left the toilet seat up, and your makeup is lopsided because he (still) haven’t fixed the light bulb in the bathroom.
You’ve asked him, nicely I’m sure, to pick up after himself and to take care of some stuff that needs fixing. But instead, he’s glued to the TV and is giving you monosyllabic answers.
So your options are clearly to a: do it yourself, or b: remind him that it still needs to be done.
That’s all there is to it, right?
Well, according to our males, there is another option: wait for it to be done. Instead of hassling him and nagging him to do the chores, patiently wait until he’s finished his ‘leisure time’ so he can get right onto it. Because the more you nag and complain, the less he’ll want to do it.
So, break out of this vicious cycle before it hurts your relationship. Here are nine tips to get help you get started.
#2 Asking him what he’s thinking
Picture this:You’re driving along the highway when you notice a decidedly thoughtful expression on your man’s face. In typical fashion, you address the issue immediately: “What are you thinking about?”
He spares you a quick glance and answers honestly: “The lines in the middle of the road.”
Uh … not quite the answer you were expecting. But, you take it. A few hours later, the same expression hovers on his face. Without hesitation, you ask him again what he’s thinking. He responds, honestly, that he was wondering whether the cows on the side of the road were sleeping. He also begins to look moderately irritated.
But why? All you did was ask him what he was thinking about. Well, the fact is that if your man is thinking about something in particular and he wants to share that thought with you, he will. Otherwise, he’s going to keep it to himself. And when you consistently ask him what he’s thinking, you firmly settle into annoying territory.
Now we’re not saying that guys aren’t capable of deep and meaningful thoughts. They absolutely are. But unlike women, they’re not constantly pondering relationship dilemmas, a comment you made two weeks ago, or trying to solve the world’s problems in one car ride. And if they are, they’ll tell you.
But if they’re not … well, they don’t really want that fact highlighted do they? So give your guy a break and let him come to you with his thoughts.
#3 Complaining about your weight
Okay, so I am equal parts understanding and critical of this item on the list. Sure, we all have our insecurities. Whether it’s our weight, our hair, how close our eyes are together or the shape of our toes. None of us are perfect.
Do you really need to bring these things to your man’s attention? And more to the point, how do you expect him to react? There’s only a couple of ways this conversation can turn out.
“Ugh, I feel so fat.”
“That’s not true, sweetheart. You look incredible.”
“You can’t tell me how I feel! I’m a heifer!”
Right. So that one didn’t go too well. Let’s try another approach, shall we?
“Ugh, I feel so fat.”
“Yeah, you have gained a little bit of weight.”
Silence. Finally, the sound of a dull thump echoes through the room as you grab the nearest object and whack it over his head. Okay, surely there’s another way to wiggle out of this one.
“Ugh, I feel so fat.”
“You are the most beautiful woman in the world.”
“You’re biased! You have to say that!”
Okay, fine. There’s no way to get out of this conversation with dignity. So why bring it up? You’re only setting him up for failure, and he knows it, which is why this drives him crazy.
#4 Crashing bro time
It’s the regular fortnightly poker night at your place and your man is ensconced in the den, hamming it up with his mates. Lewd jokes are being exchanged, beer is being drunk and an abundance of crisps are circulating. He’s in guy heaven.
There’s only one problem: you forgot that it was poker night. So you have nothing else planned and seeing as you do (or practically do) live at his place, you figure there’s no harm in hanging out with the guys for the night. Right?
This is explicitly a guy zone. Which means no girlfriends allowed. Not only are you breaking the guy code by inviting yourself to your man’s poker game, but also you’re interrupting his quality time with his friends. He can’t act the same way when you’re around. His friends will be peeved that they have to mind their language and watch what they say. He will be irritated that you haven’t checked with him first. It’s all around a baaad situation.
So if you want a happy relationship, stay the heck away from poker nights, guy’s nights and football games. Which brings us to the next item on the list.
#5 D&M’s during sport time
It’s half time in the most important game of the season. You’ve been an amazing girlfriend and have loaded him up with snacks, a beer helmet and the TV remote. So far, so good.
But then, you decide that since the game doesn’t require much mental stimulation, now would be the perfect chance to speak to your man about the fight you had with a girlfriend, or the comment your Mom made over lunch the other day.
He’s nodding distractedly while you chat away. His eyes are firmly glued to the TV. And if this doesn’t clue you into where his attention truly lies, the fact that he just agreed to eat at that fancy restaurant he loathes should.
During game time, football or otherwise, conversation is strictly limited to remarks about tackles, passes and touchdowns. Anything outside of this arena is strictly a no-go zone. For him, paying attention to the game is the only way he can guarantee his team wins. If his attention wavers for even a moment, they could fumble a pass and miss out on key points. So if you’re yabbering away about how nasty your boss is, don’t expect him to be listening.
Remember: sports time isn’t for D&M’s (deep and meaningfuls). It’s for sports.
#6 “I’m fine”
Time for another conversation snippet! Join us for episode two of ‘things you do that drive him crazy’. Cue theme music.
(Woman sits on the sofa, arms crossed over her chest, with a distinct scowl on her face. Man walks in and shoots her a look.)
Man: “You okay, honey?”
Woman: “I’m fine.”
(End of scene)
Conversation over, right? Well, it might be for your man, but it’s not for us. Sure, he knows that there’s probably something wrong. He’s not stupid. But he’s under the mistaken belief that if it were serious enough to trouble you, then you’d bring it to his attention.
But, that’s not how we work sometimes. Instead, we sulk and expect him to know what’s wrong. After all, it was the comment he made that upset you in the first place. He should know that!
Er, sorry to say, but he doesn’t. He actually has no clue. That’s why he asked. So if you’re expecting a resolution, you’ll need to tell him what the issue is. Guys are great problem solvers. He’d be happy, nay thrilled, to solve the problem of your bad mood. But if you don’t tell him what’s wrong, then he’s going to act like nothing is wrong. And to expect anything less will just drive him crazy.
#7 Using a baby voice in front of his friend
Most of us have a cute nickname we call our partners in private. We probably even have a ‘voice’ that we use that’s normally reserved for their ears only. Which is fine, however you stay loved up is your business and your business alone.
The problem arises when your private displays of affection begin to stray into the public domain. Particularly in front of his mates. The fact that he is your snookie wookie with a cute widdle tooshie, should definitely, absolutely, remain private knowledge only. That means that any baby voices or affectionate nicknames are not to be pulled out in front of friends, and even family.
Not only will you give his friends an opening to rib him for years, but you’ll also seriously annoy him.
#8 Using sex as a bargaining chip
How would you feel if your man took away your sex benefits because he felt that you did, or said, something wrong? You’d be incredulous, right? Likely, you’d be thinking something along the lines of ‘How dare he!’
Because sex isn’t a privilege. And it certainly isn’t a bargaining chip. Sex is an intimate act between two people who love each other. It’s a way to express and share your love with your partner.
And yet, one of the most common complaints we hear from men is that their girlfriend restricts their ‘sex rights’ if she’s angry, or even just wants to get her own way.
If this is you, then you should be ashamed of yourself. This is the epitome of shooting yourself in the foot. Take away their beer, but don’t take away their sex.
#9 Taking forever in the bathroom
And last but not least, we have ye olde bathroom endeavor. The common stomping ground to beautify ourselves, it is also a common cause of discontent for your man.
While you insist that you need ‘adequate’ time in the bathroom, he insists that you’re spending too much time in there. And while you can’t really defend why you need so much time to get ready, you can come to a compromise.
Because the reality is that the less your man knows about your bathroom escapades, the better. All he cares about is being on time to an event, or using the bathroom himself.
So next time you’re getting ready for a night out, make an effort to start your preparations earlier. Be sure to ask him if he needs to use the bathroom before you get ready, and then primp to your hearts content. As long as you’re on time and don’t cause him to wet himself, he’ll be fine.
#10 Getting jealous
Jealousy has the power to destroy any relationship. If you truly want to make your relationship work, you must let go of any doubts and completely trust your partner. Any small doubts might grow into something serious, which will likely push them away.
Don’t get into a fight with your boyfriend because he liked a photo of another female on Facebook or Instagram. If it troubles you, tell him why, without making any accusations. He’ll likely appreciate your honesty.
Being open to change is important for you and your partner. Read on to find out if you need to take this step.
These are some of the things that drive men crazy. At the end of the day, despite their nine common complaints, guys really aren’t fussy creatures. So even if you do occasionally step out of line and break one of their unspoken rules, chances are high that they’ll forgive you pretty easily. Provided you don’t restrict their sex rights.
i usually do all of this and my fiance gets crazy about me all the time
haha,, yeah.. i really do some of these things with my bf.. i do have mood swing.. but thanks for posting this one, i had an idea on what to do.