There is being alone and there is being lonely. Although they are two very similar terms, they have very different meanings. One is completely non-emotional and the other, well, it can break your heart if you let it.
The Difference Between Being Alone and Being Lonely
Being alone simply means being by yourself, as in, there is no one else is around you. You can be alone at home, for instance, meaning that there is no one else there but you, but you can also be alone in public, suggesting that others may be in your vicinity, but they are not with you.
Being lonely, on the other hand, is completely different. It is a feeling versus a state of being – one that most people try to avoid because it is an emotion based on lacking. More specifically, it is the lacking of someone to spend time with. Preferably, someone you enjoy.
Can you be lonely even when you aren’t alone? Sure you can. You can be sitting right next to someone yet feel very alone if you aren’t connecting or communicating. People in unfulfilling relationships go through this all of the time.
But you can also be alone without being lonely. In other words, you can have no one around you and be perfectly content. So, if you find yourself with no one to keep you company, here are 12 things you can do to cheer you up and make your alone time something you actually look forward to:
#1: Become a Rock Star
When you’re the only one around, it creates the best time for you to get in touch with your wild girl side and become that rock star that you’ve always wanted to be. Dress up in some superstar clothing (you can find fun pieces of apparel and accessories at thrift or secondhand stores for next to nothing in price) and pretend that you are on stage in front of thousands of fans. Feel free to sing your heart out! No one is there to hear your off key voice anyway.
#2: Get In Touch With Your Quiet Side
Most women nowadays wish they had some quiet time alone, so instead of looking it like a bad thing, think of all the other females you know who wish they were you right now. They’d give anything to get some peace and quiet – the one thing you have that they don’t.
Enjoy yours by meditating or just sitting in total silence. It may feel awkward at first, especially if you’re usually on the go, but you will probably come to look forward to this alone time after a while because you can actually hear yourself think; something you may not have heard in quite some time.
#3: Reach a Goal
If you feel lost when no one else is around you, you can distract yourself by actually being productive. Set a goal for yourself and use your alone time to take the steps necessary to reach it. This will leave you feeling proud of what you’ve accomplished and thinking about other goals you’d like to achieve.
#4: Pamper Yourself
When you are alone, you can pamper yourself without one ounce of guilt because you don’t have to sideline anyone else’s request for your time. You simply immerse yourself in whatever makes you feel good and to heck with the rest of the world. So, take a bath, give yourself a mani, or sit on the porch and get some sun – it’s all about you at this point.
#5: Be Disgusting
One great thing about being alone is that you can be disgusting without worrying about anyone else judging you. Sit on the couch with your gut hanging out or belch as loud as you can versus trying to stifle it. This type of behavior makes being alone a great opportunity to get in touch with your less than feminine side.
#6: Get Lost In Someone Else’s World
If being alone makes you feel lonely, get lost in someone else’s world by picking up and reading a book by your favorite author. Time will fly so quickly when you’re engaged in someone else’s adventures that you’ll wish you had even more alone time to see what they get involved in next!
#7: Enjoy Nature
It’s hard to truly enjoy nature when someone else is around because this particular act requires complete and total silence. Find a quiet place to sit where you can watch the animals play and listen to the sounds of the trees or water and let Mother Nature keep you occupied. Actually, if you have animals and Mother nature around you, you’re not really alone after all.
#8: Work Up a Sweat
Exercise is a great thing to do when you’re lonely because it releases endorphins which are feel-good hormones that make you feel happier and full of life – exactly what you need if you are on the lonely side.
#9: Watch a Chic Flick
Chic flicks are generally tear-jerkers, which makes alone time a wonderful time to watch one. That way you don’t have to sit next to someone else and blubber through the movie. You can sob as loud as you want because there is no one there to hush you or roll their eyes.
#10: Engage In Your Passion
Loneliness sometimes results from boredom, but both can be cured if you engage in your passion. Pick up a hobby that you can do alone, and make it something that you love. Some ideas may include cross stitch, photography, painting – basically whatever makes you smile!
#11: Daydream
You don’t have to do anything during your time alone to be happy. You can just relish in the fact that you have nowhere to go and nothing to do and use your time to daydream. Think about whatever you want to think about without being disrupted by reality.
#12: Just Be Yourself
When you are alone you can just be yourself. You don’t have to put on a happy face or try to please anyone else and can do whatever you’d like whenever you’d like. It is very freeing.
Don’t look at being alone as a curse. Instead, look at it as one simple pleasure that many women would love to have and enjoy it because, all too soon, someone will likely be asking you to do something. Then, you’ll no longer be alone.
Cover photo: tumblr.com
This article starts off well – it makes it clear the difference between being alone, and being lonely.
… But then the article continues to give ways to help feeling less bummed when you are on your own – when you are alone.
If you are truly suffering from loneliness, then these tips aren’t going to help. “Being gross” and “being yourself”. Ha. I’d have dealt with my issues a long time ago if these tips helped your loneliness.
As for the very last comment: Wrong. As mentioned at the beginning of the article, you can feel lonely when surrounded by people. Your loneliness isn’t going to go away when your family are demanding your help and presence and time, so acting like you should ’embrace your loneliness like a gift’ is not only wrong, but also a very damaging way of thinking. Romaniticising mental health issues – no matter how small or trivial they may be – is never a way of dealing with them.
I agree. This article was a waste of time for me.
This was disappointing to read. Particualrly the part about thinking someone else would love to be in our shoes. I am lonely because I am alone. I have no friends: so yes I go to the movies alone, go out to dinner alone, spend time alone in my home etc. My family is not around either. The thought that someone would love to be in my shoes is absolutely ridiculous, one, and second even if that were the case how on earth would that make me feel better? ‘Stop complaining, you have it better than you think!’ lol At any rate, I am typically okay with the way things are, but today I felt a little sad so I wanted a cheer up. I rarely comment, but this post was so off the mark it was insulting. I understand that everyone copes and experiences differently, but reading this made me wonder if you’ve ever truly been lonely? By the way, I advocate for being yourself all the time, not just when you’re alone. In fact, I believe this post is more suited for advice on how to be cheerful in your daily life, regardless of if you’re lonely or not. I mean, please do pursue your passion, exercise and daydream time is good too. Unfortunately, having a well-rounded personal life on an individual level, is not always a substitute for having meaningful human interaction and/or relationships.