Marriage is amazing, but there are also the ups and downs that are a part of our everyday lives. These ups and downs, are ones which can easily affect your relationship and cause stress to you and your husband.
Some stressors that can be the root cause of stress in your husband’s life could be money, his job, your job, kids, family tension, your relationship, his friends, his or your health, the house, and so on.
Even if you are aware of what your husband is stressed about, it can still leave you thinking “my husband is stressed, and I have no idea what to do”.
However, you are a Queen, you know your husband better than anyone else, and you do know what to do. You may just need some guidance to help you.
Read on to learn how to help alleviate your husband’s stress and what to look for.
How to know if he’s stressed?
Some good indicators to see if your husband is stressed is to compare his current behavior with how he usually acts with you.
When comparing his current behavior with his usual one, you should look for how he usually talks, texts, his body language, his mood and even his health compared to how he is now.
He is constantly fighting with you
He is arguing with you more than he ever has. This tends to be a major sign of a stressed husband. He will be what some women describe as snapping over the smallest and most meaningless of things due to how stressed and upset he is.
He won’t tell you what’s really bothering him, but he will possibly argue or fight over the smallest of things as he is trying to take out his anger for what is really stressing him out.
However, despite your husband being stressed, you aren’t his punching bag or his outlet for his anger. Remember to help him, be there for him, and to calm him down, but also make sure he doesn’t treat you horribly.
He is becoming more critical
He’ll be more critical of you and what you do or say, due to him being so stressed. This is a reoccurring part of his stressed behavior as whatever he is stressed out over, he can’t fix. Meaning, he will be trying to control, fix, or nitpick and judge whatever else he can, due to his bad mood.
The romance has left your nest
He won’t be anywhere near as affectionate, loving, sweet, caring, romantic, or attentive to you as he usually is.
This is a big sign of your husband being stressed as it will just drain so much energy from him and leave him not feeling romantic due to what is on his mind.
Additionally, he also won’t be wanting to express his love to you in the sheets for the exact same reasons. He may even struggle to get or sustain an erection due to his stress.
Health issues might occur
This is a very serious side effect that is associated with high, intense levels of stress.
It has been proven, that being overly stressed can cause heart attacks, cancer, ulcers, strokes, blood pressure issues, colds, a weakened immune system, headaches, sleep deprivation, and other issues that will affect his health for the worse.
Meaning, if your husband is starting to feel sick, have even more aches and pains, or to exhibit other symptoms of diseases and health issues, you really need to get him to a doctor, or alleviate his stress right away.
He’s in withdrawal
You will start to notice that he will be more withdrawal at home. He won’t pay as much attention to you or what he’s doing, he’ll zone out, and he will want even more alone time. He may even be more absent-minded as a result of his stress.
No comfort
Instead of your husband being his sweet, comforting self, he will be not so emotional or connected to you and won’t comfort or support you as much.
In addition to all of the other symptoms that your husband will display if he is stressed, he will also act like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.
He will also leave no time for his hobbies or usual activities, he will be fatigued, edgy, distracted, and will even have over-exaggerated reactions to bad concepts that are large, or minimal.
How to help him?
As mentioned above, you know your husband best, you know his stress symptoms best, and you know how to help him best. However, many women who have a stressed husband will wonder how to help him and due to the worry consuming them they become stressed themselves.
As well, many women have are starting conversations with their friends by saying “my husband is stressed”, and they then go on to talk about how it affects them and their marriage because the don’t know how to help him.
In order to avoid those conversations and that uneasy feeling you have while being unsure of what to do, read YouQueens solutions below to help you understand how to help your husband.
Healthier meals
Due to health issues associated with stress, it is important to cook healthy foods for your husband to eat in order for him to boost his immune system, and to even feel better in general.
Exercise
Exercise has been proven to reduce stress, clear people’s minds, allow them to focus better, be healthier, and be happier. Exercise is a very important and strong remedy for eliminating stress.
By him exercising he will be doing something cathartic. It will also allow him to exert all of his bad energy, and to bring good energy back into his life.
This will help him figure out how to fix what he’s stressed about and to help him not be stressed later on.
No “to do” lists
If you and your husband split the housework or have lists of what has to be done, do the work for him without telling him. That way when he looks at his list it is empty.
As much as you don’t want to do more chores this will really help your stressed husband. Due to him feeling stressed over something in his life, he doesn’t need to feel like he has even more on his plate.
If he feels that way, he will become more overwhelmed and more stressed due to what he has to do and the fact that it is all piling up.
Help him lighten up
Laughter is the best medicine, do things that always make him laugh or watch his favorite comedy movies to cheer him up. The more laughter the better, it will be guaranteed to help him relax and cheer up.
Quality time
Plan dates and activities for the two of you to do together that he loves to do. For example, if your husband loves to hike then plan a road trip to a great hiking trail and spend the day enjoying nature and having fun.
Regardless of what he loves to do, it will help him be happy, realize you are with him and by his side. As a result, he will feel some relief and happiness instead of constant stress.
Be romantic
Everyone wants to feel loved and cared for, especially when times are tough. Do romantic gestures which he will absolutely love. This will be a reminder of the good times and it will make him happy.
By being romantic it will show him that you are with him no matter what and that you love and care for him.
Give him space
As much as this seems to be counter-intuitive, it isn’t. In fact, this is very important when it comes to helping your stressed husband. He may want more time to think, to breath, and to be himself.
Whatever he is stressed about is eating him up and sometimes you have to be there for him, but also give him the space he needs as he has to do this on his own.
However, make sure you are still supportive and there for him when you need to be.
Be his wife, not his mom
Do not boss him around, nag, pester, or hover over him. Instead, just be there to support, love, and care.
As much as it may seem that you need to do some motherly actions, don’t, and if you do, infuse it with love and care, and make it minimal so it is in a wife loving way.
Be patient
Patience is a virtue and one you must have. Don’t get frustrated, down, or rush him in whatever process he is taking. It is important to do this for him as you love him and care for him, and need to be there for him while you help him along the way.
Being on the sidelines while you are worrying about your stressed husband is a very difficult task. Sadly, it is one that many women face as their husbands keep their stress to themselves.
However, a big thing to stop or prevent the stress from growing or happening is to talk about it with each other.
Communication and being together as a team is crucial for any relationship. This way you handle life’s curve balls as a couple because that’s what the two of you are. In turn, that then makes your lives both much easier and your relationship much stronger.
Stress is something that affects everyone and is something that is a monkey on everyone’s backs at certain times. It is important to be there for each other and to work through it together as a couple.
If you can think of any more solutions to helping a stressed husband, feel free to share below!
Definitely written by women for women but next time can we write an article after actually having consulted men in real life? Do the women who read this honestly think men need romance to improve stress? Maybe I didn’t read between the lines correctly but asking for “Romantic gestures” does not sounds like anything my guys would ask. Pleasuring his member is a place to start. A.k.a Sexual Intimacy is %100 more in tune with men’s needs during tumultuous times than filling his romance bucket. Or in other words S*ck his D*ck ! Moreover , this article was clearly written for the “queens” who need an ego boost. yOu kNOw YouR mAN , right?? Then proceeds to suggest that he should go exercise..A man will take himself to the gym only if he’s compelled to do so but suggesting it will likely not change the situation. Also, this article attempts to focus on men’s health but goes on with “everyone gets stressed🥴” on some All Lives Matter vibes and half the time we’re just talking about how it affects the woman in the relationship . Not to mention the expectation that our default should be to be always sweet and to comfort you and if we’re not giving the world to you then something is off about us? Oh, the arrogance of women. And please do not plan dates that put any expectations on him . Even if it’s his interests. It won’t alleviate his stress. That’s what you do when he’s in a good place with you.
In fairness, some good points like give him space, make him laugh, cook him good meals. Those are actually better suggestions. Being patient is good practice too. Take up some of his chores👍 but yeah consult with like a focus group of men or something before publishing something like this. My sister often will send me articles on how to support your wife as a husband and those are definitely always written by women not men.