What Men Like in Women: It’s Not What You Think

Does a woman have to have a perfect body or a perfect face? Does she have to be rich? Does she have to be a sex Goddess? Actually, no, let me tell you what men really like in women!

I’m sure that you’ve walked around the streets of your town and seen happy couples who, let’s be honest, aren’t going to win any beauty contests. I’m sure you’ve seen average looking women with drop dead gorgeous men too, right? I’ll admit it, I’m no beauty queen myself. Rarely have I been referred to as “sexy”, I was more commonly called the much less desirable “cute”, but I’ve managed to land a few men way out of my league.

When a very plain woman like me ends up with some gorgeous Greek God, my friends ask the inevitable “Okay, how did you do that?”

It’s easy. I was just being myself.

You see, all men are different, and the outside appearance doesn’t necessarily match the inside feelings of a person. You could have some muscular hunk of a man who prefers women with a few extra pounds (I know, I’ve dated a few of them), or you could have some tall dark and handsome guy who likes his women more on the “arm candy” side. You really never know.

However, there are a few things that are universal in the world of what men like in women. Aside from great sex (admit it…we like that in our men, too), there really are things that men want. Here is a list of the top ten things that men like in women.

1. Kindness

Teen couple bonding

The arrogant, snarky woman might land her man, but she won’t keep him. Men get tired of high maintenance rude women who only care about themselves. Now, that does not mean you should be a doormat. In fact, men hate the doormat act just as much, but if you want to catch a good man you are going to have to be kind to your fellow men and women.

2. Style

Every man has a certain taste; however, all men like for their women to be at least clean and presentable. Some of them prefer women dressed to the ninths at all times, and others like them in jeans and t-shirts. Whichever the case may be, and whichever style is preferred, always remember to look your absolute best. Not just for him, but for yourself as well.

3. Intelligence

I was working behind the counter of a food shop once, and in came this young couple. He was good looking and she was very, very gorgeous. He spoke intelligently and with manners. She popped her gum loudly and mispronounced most of her words, not to mention her grammar was awful. I could see him roll his eyes whenever she opened her mouth. My first thought was, this won’t last.

Men like to play around with women who aren’t really on the intelligent side, but they don’t keep them around forever. Guys like intelligent women. You don’t have to be super smart; I’m not talking rocket science or anything, but you should at least be able to keep a conversation with your guy.

4. Fun

Portrait of happy loving couple having a pillow fight in bed

Are you a stay-at-home kind of woman? Do you prefer to sit in the comfort of your own living room rather than to go out to the movies or see a football game? If this is you, then you’re boring. I’m sorry, but someone should tell you.

It’s okay, there’s still hope.

You see, there’s always great comfort in being able to come home to your girlfriend and settle in to some TV and snacks, but that can’t be all that you do! You have to get out and have fun once in a while; you have to have a night out on the town with a round of drinks! Guys like women who know how to have fun!

Again, I’m not talking crazy fun, you don’t have to be the life of the party letting everyone suck Jell-O shots off your navel, but you do have to leave your living room occasionally.

5. That she be good with kids

You might never want to have children. Your guy might never want them either. However, guys still want a woman that’s good with kids. It’s a psychological or biological thing that tells men you’ll be a good mom if they decide to spread their seed. Plus, it shows your guy you’re a kind person when you get along with children.

6. Good housekeeping abilities

Yes, your mother was right; men do want women to be good housekeepers. The old saying is true you know, “Be a cook in the kitchen, a maid in the living room, and a whore in the bedroom”. I know, it seems sexist and anti-feminist and everything else you can think of that’s wrong with that statement, but it’s still true.

If you’re a good cook, keep your home clean, and can be a bit naughty in the bedroom, he’s going to love that! I’m not saying you HAVE to be any or all of those things; I’m just saying men like it.

7. Honesty

the image of couple in bed

Just like you, guys like women who are honest. If you are a habitual liar, you never tell him the full truth, you lie about your past, or you keep secrets from him, he’s going to constantly find your behavior suspicious and quickly become distrustful.

That being said let me also warn you not to be too honest. I’ve found that when I’ve opened up to a man completely, let him in on all of my sins and faults, and shared my most intimate feelings and fears, he has, at some point, thrown them in my face and used them against me, usually during a break-up.

I made the mistake of sharing everything that I am with someone three times; I will not likely make that same mistake again. Some secrets, some sins, some emotions are yours and yours alone. Be wary of telling everything to someone.

8. Faithfulness

This should be a no-brainer, but I’m saying it anyway. Men like to know that they’re the only one you’re sleeping with. Maybe I’m not good at this “no strings attached” thing, but when I sleep with someone, even when I feel as if there’s no possibility of a relationship between us, I still prefer it to be a monogamous event. I want to be his only lover and he mine. It doesn’t always happen that way, but it’s preferable.

Men, when it comes to serious relationships, want their woman to be theirs and only theirs. None of this “no strings” stuff for their girlfriend, they want you all to themselves. Faithfulness, both physically and emotionally, is important and they want to be the only man in your life.

9. Happiness

Loving and happy couple embracing and laughing

Okay, the easiest way to put this is that no guy wants to date a sad woman. How’s he supposed to introduce you to his friends if you’re always depressed or in a bad mood? Men like women who are cheerful and upbeat. Now, you can have bad days, you should have bad days, but you should also be, for the most part, a happy person to be around. I can say that it works both ways.

10. Independence

You cannot rely on him for everything. Men like women who have an independent life and are not defined by the relationship. You have to have outside interests, you must be able to spend a day or two not seeing him, and you have to let the man breathe once in a while.

Plus, showing him that you’re a strong and independent woman (with the occasional weak moment of course) builds up his respect for you. Guys don’t’ want to have to save a woman all the time, show him you are capable and able to be on your own…but don’t forget to let him help you out every now and again.

I’ll repeat this, every man is different. They all have different tastes in looks and personality, but, these ten things are important to a guy when he’s thinking of getting serious with a woman. This is what men like in their girlfriend. So, the question now is, what do you like in your men?

About the author


Just another hard working mom who loves her kid, loves to write, can’t cook, and has a thing for tentacles! When I’m not hanging out with my Spawn, I’m happily sharing my dating experiences and offering advice and trying to control the chaos that comes with being human.


Click here to post a comment

  • How about love yourself and enjoy being you?? What a guy think of you should not be a priority. Opposite sex should not define and validate your worth!

    • I completely agree, Bru. But this articles is meant for women who are trying to find a good guy to date. You don’t have to be perfect to find the right guy, I’m not saying that, I’m just giving a few universal guidelines. If you reverse the roles, these are usually things women like in men as well…intelligence, kindness, honestly, cleanliness….it’s not meant to be feminist, it’s meant to be informative. The first thing the opposite sex notices is how you look (you can deny it all you want, but it’s true). Be yourself, have your own mind and your own opinions, LOVE YOURSELF FIRST…but if you’re trying to get a relationship, you have to bring out the best in yourself. That works for both men and women.

    • Thank you, Bryan. Being true to yourself is most important, but I believe that in order to attract a good mate you have to be a good person , and have your priorities straight (both men and women)…I’m hoping this article portrayed those ideals.

  • Your comment is too feminist bru. I know you want to uphold your gender. But there’s a line between being feminine and feminist.

  • Be yourself and live your life the way u want it to be.. There will be someone who likes u for the way you are.. As simple as that :)