Dating

Falling In Love Through Social Media: What Not To Do

Social media is a great way for people to connect, but it can make it hard to truly connect when you like someone. Here's what to avoid when falling in love with someone on social media.

Many of us have several different social media accounts—most of which are open for the world to see. We come across plenty of people we otherwise would have no way of meeting in real life.

This can be a great way to bring together people from different walks of life and meet otherwise unattainable people, thus adding to your social circle in a very real way. But, when you come across someone on social media, follow their account and find yourself falling in love them, what should you do?

Stop and reflect

online dating

Instead of constantly watching their social media feed, you should really look inside yourself to figure out what it is about this person that has you so spun. Being physically attracted to someone you’ve only seen pictures of is very different to having a physical connection because you have yet to meet the person and feel their energy.

Hot faces are everywhere on social media, and the person you’re interested in is just another one of those good looking people you wait for to upload a selfie. If you’re obsessed with someone on social media, there’s also a good chance that something in your physical life is missing. It’s better to figure that out instead of creating a picture inside your head of a life with this person.

Cue the 12-step meeting

If you can’t help but stalk your social media crush, there’s a good chance they’re going to think you’re crazy. Getting constant notifications, even from people you know, can be a little too aggressive, so if you’re doing it to him to try to get him to notice you, he may just be less and less interested in you by default.

Instead of liking all his photos or commenting on everything, take a step back and maybe go out on a real date with someone you’ve met in person. This could help with the obsession by getting you in touch with someone you’ve just idealized.

Social media life isn’t real life

woman looking at a cell phone

What people post on social media tends to be the highlight reel. It’s not the ups and downs of everything they experience, but the best parts of their life. They post good selfies when they look good and nothing when they don’t. They’ll post great experiences while having them and no experiences when they’re just laying in front of the TV, eating junk food.

The version of the person you see on social media is only a portion of who that person really is, so it’s important to remember that when getting attached to someone you’ve only seen the best of. It’s easy to fall for someone when all you see from them is amazing things and great adventures, but that’s not how real relationships work.

They are not as they seem

Again, when people post on social media, it isn’t all truth. This can also be said for the idea of them you’ve cooked up in your mind. Their posts may make them seem fun, brilliant cultured and adventurous, but when it comes right down to it, they are just posts. They’re not who that person is.

They do reflect somewhat of who they are, but they only feed into the less-than-accurate idea you’ve painted in your mind of what kind of person they are.

It’s not easy to accept that fact, but it is better than continuing to build someone up into some kind of god when you should know that they’re just another person with flaws. It’s important not to put anyone on a pedestal, especially someone you’ve only seen a fraction of through their social media channels.

Go for it if you can

online dating

If you’ve accepted all these steps and still can’t seem to get them out of your mind, maybe there is something about them that is calling to you. It’s not always the case, but for some reason unknown to you, you have to go for it. Be the first person to make a move, and inbox them a simple hello message.

It may not be the easiest thing in the world, but getting to know them on a real level will either confirm that you two are connected for whatever reason, or it could bring you back to earth and help you get over your obsession. We are in the digital age, so dating someone you met on social media isn’t frowned upon at all; if you’re willing to go for it, then it will help you in the long run.

These are just a few tips on how to deal with liking someone you’ve never met but know through your social media channels. If you’ve ever become obsessed with a love interest you met on social media, how did you deal with it?

About the author

Angie B.

Angie B. is an avid book reader and dabbler in all things creative. Words are her paramours and she lives to love. Her friends call her their personal therapist and she loves giving advice on relationships, style choices and everything in between.

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