The Single Life: Are You A 20 Something Grandma?

When you’re in your 20’s, people expect you to go out every night and waste your money on things. Here’s what it's like to be 21 and already over that life.

I am a 21-year-old woman who is so tired of being “weird” for not wanting to go out every night. I’m not an antisocial person, but I just can’t find it in myself to go out and drink on a Wednesday. I can’t justify it anymore.

Yes, in the past I’ve been the person who will be more than willing to go out until 4 in the morning and then go to class the next day, but I’m already over it. Some call me an “old soul” while others just think there’s something wrong with me.

My friends think it’s really odd that I don’t have a desire to participate in college drinking “holidays” like Syllabus week and Homecoming. They don’t understand what happened to the girl who was always up for anything.

Turns out that getting your life together makes it a little difficult to find the will to want to go back to your old ways.

Here are some of the things that happen when you’re a “grandma” when you’re still in your 20’s.

1. You enjoy spending time in rather than going out

young blonde woman enjoying a cup of coffee

I swear, spending a night wrapped up in your blankets, preferably on a comfy bed, is the best way to spend a night. You don’t have to worry about looking good for anyone, and there’s no one to impress.

When you go out, there’s always an expectation that you’re going out to find someone, so you get all dressed up (which was always the best part of my night and the only thing I miss) in the hopes that some boy who is not even worth your time or energy notices you. No thanks.

College boys care about two things: get messed up and finding a girl to get into bed with. If you want that, then great. Good for you. But I’m over the one night stands and watching guys I’m interested in going after girls who are not me.

I think part of the reason I don’t care about going out as much has a lot to do with my boyfriend, but still. A night spent hanging out with my closest friends in a place where we can actually hear each other talk is much better than spending a night in a crowded room sweating my hair out and going deaf trying to hear what my screaming friends are saying.

2. When you do go out, it’s to get breakfast or coffee

When I do go out now, it’s usually to go get breakfast. Yeah, I sound like an old woman. That’s the whole point of the article. While everyone else is trying to sleep off their hangovers, I’m already awake and begging my boyfriend to try a new breakfast place with me or to go get coffee with me, even though he hates coffee.

woman eating breakfast in a restaurant

There are so many moments you miss in life when you’re only focused on seeing how high you can get your body count to be or how many shots you can take without dying. I’m not trying to talk badly about people who do choose to live this way because there’s nothing wrong with it. If that’s how you want to live your life, then have fun with it.

Finding interesting things to do can be difficult at times, but it can be fun to find something out of the norm to do. The best part of acting like a grandma in your 20’s means that people learn not to constantly ask you to go out anymore.

3. You don’t get FOMO

young brunette enjoying coffee and reading newspapers

There is no fear of missing out when you really don’t see the fun in doing what other people are doing. There was a time when I would look at the Snapchats my friends would post and get jealous that I wasn’t invited to go with them.

But then I did go out with them and realized that the only thing they ever did was show off for Snapchat and social media. They were either always looking at their phones or annoyed by one of the many things they seemed to go wrong for them.

There was always something that could get in the way of them having a good time. This always bothered me, even when I was into going out. I never understood why going out had to be such a big deal. It’s so much easier to just do what you want to do instead of doing something you pretend you like to do so you can be a part of something.

4. You have better relationships with people

young friends hugging and smiling

When you find people who are interested in things that you are as well makes friendships a lot easier and more genuine. You learn to appreciate spending time with people instead of trying to impress everyone else. There are obviously people out there who also consider themselves to be grandmothers of their generation, too.

It’s a lot easier to get to know someone when you can sit down and be able to talk for hours. I still have people to drink with, but we know how to drink and don’t feel the need to black out every single time we do decide to drink.

There are more things to do besides get drunk and do the same things with people. You can find different places to go, restaurants to eat at, or anything you could think of. The only downside is that being a grandmother of your generation doesn’t mean you don’t spend just as much money during the weekends. Sorry. Just happens.

I want to say that I am not knocking on people who do love to go out and do all of the things that I don’t find to be as fun. It’s just a different type of lifestyle and different interests.

There are great things about each thing, and people are able to choose whatever they’d like to do. I just enjoy being old and staying in bed, doing whatever I’d like without being judged.

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About the author

Myranda Siegert

Hey, I'm Myranda. I'm an absolute hopeless romantic. I've always loved writing about subjects that will hit close to home, and make people really think more deeply about themselves. I show myself through my writing, as well as my photography.

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