There are some people who don’t believe in the “rebound” girl, they honestly think there’s no such thing as rebound. I’ve never understood that, because I myself have been the rebound girl on occasion. Yes, it sucks, but over the years I’ve learned how to read those rebound signs.
Sometimes the sign is pretty obvious, like when he calls out his ex’s name during sex (believe me, this is not a fun way to spend the night).
Other times, however, the signs are not so obvious. You might wonder if he’s playing you or if he’s just being a jerk. You could be wondering if you’re being over sensitive, or if there really is something to worry about. If he has just gotten out of a relationship with someone else, and you’re the first girl since, then you might have to use your head before your heart. Look for these signs before you get your heart broken.
1) He Never Asks How You’re Doing
One of the benefits of being in a relationship is that you have someone to ask you how you’re doing or ask how your day was. If your guy never concerns himself with your everyday feelings and events, then he might not care in that “relationship” kind of way, which could mean you’re a rebound girl.
2) He Doesn’t Recognize the Things That Are Important to You
Someone who cares about you recognizes those things that are important to you, and genuinely makes the effort to incorporate those things into your life. If you’ve had to tell him ten times that you like your tea with milk, and he still asks, then he’s not paying attention to you. If you have the flu and he doesn’t ask how you’re feeling after a day or two, then he doesn’t care. Not caring is a big sign you’re rebound.
3) It’s Just Sex (No Love Making)
Don’t stress over this just yet, some guys are genuinely just not good at making love and sex is just sex. Is he holding you and cuddling you afterwards? Is there intimacy? Does he stay the night or does he just get up and leave?
4) He’s Emotionless
If you and your guy have been dating at least a couple of months, then there must be some feelings involved. If he’s still pretty cold emotionally, and he shrugs it off or makes lite of your feelings, then you might be the rebound girl. Men get just as attached to women as we do them, so at some point in a long term monogamous relationship he should be feeling something more than lukewarm towards you.
5) He Still Talks About His Ex
When a man is with a woman he cares about, his ex is no longer in the picture. If, however, he still talks about her (what they used to do together, where they went, how much she hurt him, etc.) then you’re probably in a rebound relationship. Honestly, even if he’s talking negative about his ex, the fact that she’s still constantly on his mind is a huge red flag!
6) He Sees You at HIS Convenience
If you have one of those relationships where he only sees you when it’s convenient for him, then beware. A guy who really cares and really likes you will go out of his way to see you any chance he gets. There are exceptions. Men who work a lot are naturally exhausted all the time, and they prefer to sleep and eat before seeing you. Not only does being tired and hungry put them in a bad mood, but they also really don’t enjoy anyone else’s company when they feel that way. If your man works odd hours or sixty hours a week, it could just be work…not rebound.
7) You’ve Never Met His Friends or Family
After three months you should have met at least some of his friends and family. You’re a part of his life at this point, so he should be treating you as if you are and introducing you to other people in his life. If that’s not happening, then you have another red flag.
8) He Has No Interest in Meeting Your Friends or Family
After a few months, he should at least be more than happy to go out with you and your friends every now and then, if not…he’s not really interested in you. A man who is interested in you will be interested in who you are as a person, which includes your friends and family.
9) He Never Introduces You as His “Girlfriend”
Aside from a few months of dating, even if it’s new and you’re just heading into this relationship, if your guy doesn’t introduce you as his “girlfriend”, you could be rebound. For example, introductions such as “this is my friend….” or “this is…..” or no introduction at all are all rebound red flags.
10) You Know it Doesn’t Feel Right
Finally, one of the biggest and most obvious signs that you’re the rebound girl is that the relationship just doesn’t feel right. You know what I mean. Trust your gut instinct, go with your inner voice. If you don’t think your man is over his ex, if you don’t think he’s treating you the way a man should treat his girlfriend, then he’s probably not.
Only you know your relationship, and that means you know when something isn’t quite right. Don’t be the rebound girl. Let this guy go and move on to someone that does care about you. After all, you don’t want to be the third wheel to the memory of his ex, do you?