3 Ways to Raise Your Self-Esteem – Immediately

Do you spend a lot of time feeling down about yourself? Maybe you wish your thighs were smaller or your hair long and flowing? Here's what to do to look into the mirror and smile at the image staring back at you.

Self-esteem is a major obstacle for many women (and men too). If you have a low image of yourself, it can keep you from being happy and reaching your full potential. It can stop you from achieving your dreams and cause you to live a life that doesn’t live up to your expectations.

And, if you’re like most women, you’ve battled with your self-image for years. You’ve tried to find new ways to start to feel better about yourself. Maybe some have even worked, for a short time anyway.

But, what do you do if you are fresh out of ideas and still don’t feel like a million bucks?

Create an “I am” List

woman thinking and holding a notebook

If you want to walk a little taller and be able to keep your chin up, this is one way to do it. It seems simple (almost too simple to work) but once you try it, you’ll see that it really does impact how you feel about yourself – immediately.

Sit down with a piece of paper and write “I am” at the top of it. Now, down the sheet, list all of the things that you wish followed that phrase. They may be related to career (such as “I am an attorney” or “I am in the top of my field”), or they may involve your personal relationships (“I am a good mom” or “I am a loving wife”).

Of course, you’ll likely include personal ideologies on there too. Maybe you want your “I am” to be followed by “a person that exercises every day” or “patient with others”. Don’t worry about editing your list as you go-just include everything on it that, to you, would create a perfect you.

Just writing down what it is that you want to achieve goes a long way as you’ve committed your goals to paper, making them more real. But, there is something else you can do with the list that will actually bring them into reality.

Every morning, read the list to yourself. Start with “I am” before each item. Feel it. Believe it. Imagine that you are the person that you desire so much to be (which, you are but you just haven’t let her out yet).

Very quickly you will feel the transition not only in your spirit, but also in the results you’re able to achieve. You are essentially training your mind to make your dreams come true – with minimal effort. And, you will feel so good about yourself, you’ll start to wonder why you ever had low self-esteem to begin with.

Have a Feel-Good Girl Party


When you’re feeling down about yourself, it’s hard to spread cheer and positivity. However, those are the two emotions that you need more of right now. And, what better way to get them than with a group of your closest girlfriends?

This party is different than other get-togethers though, as the focus is to encourage an environment of blessings and increasing self-worth. It’s not a time to spread gossip and tell stories about who is doing what. This is all about you and the girls learning (and realizing) what you’re worth.

There are several ways to achieve this. You can create games in which people assign different pleasant or enjoyable traits and qualities to each other. See who can collect the most different ones or even who can collect the fewest (as this would mean that they have them at stronger levels).

You can also have the guests write about other guests. Title their papers, “What I wish (insert name here) realized about herself.” Have each gal write about a different pal and, when you’re all done, let them share them in front of the group.

Yes, this sounds kind of sappy and definitely unconventional, but sometimes it is nice to hear how others view you. And, when someone else points out something about you that makes them smile, how can that not do your heart (and your self-image) some good?

Use Your Outside Self to Influence Your Inside Self


Nothing can shake your self-esteem more than doing things that you struggle with or that are hard for you. They can make you question who you are, what you’re worth and why you even exist.

However, when you engage in things you excel at, it does just the opposite. You feel better about yourself and are left with a sense of accomplishment. It reminds you that, although you’re not good at everything, there are some things that you have mastered.

So, if you’re suffering from low self-worth, it’s time to reinforce your positive qualities by choosing to do something that you know, without a shadow of the doubt, that you rock out of this world. Maybe you are extremely proficient with a musical instrument or you’re an avid runner with the best form on the block. Whatever it is, get out there and make it happen.

Let your mind enjoy the feeling of doing something extremely well. Feel like the expert that you are and you’ll instantly start walking a little taller and speaking with a little more authority. You’re basically using your outside self to help influence your inside self.

It’s the same as when you smile if you’re feeling sad. Even though you don’t feel it at first, your mind recognizes that your body is in a stature of happiness so it tries to realign with that thought. Before you know it, you truly feel happy. It’s as if you transform yourself from the outside in.

This is exactly what happens when you do something that you know you do well at and that makes you feel good about yourself. You start to feel it because your body feels good, so it tells your mind to feel the same.

Self-esteem can definitely be hard to lift, but it isn’t impossible. Try these three things and you’ll start to like that image in the mirror. After all, she’s pretty great.

About the author

Christina DeBusk

Changing careers mid-life from law enforcement to writing, Christina spends her days helping others enrich their businesses and personal lives one word at a time.

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