Seduction

8 Valid Reasons Why You Should NEVER Chase A Man

Just because the ‘chase’ is a crucial part of the relationship, doesn’t mean that you should chase your boyfriend to keep your relationship interesting. Men should still do the chasing for these reasons.

We all have heard about the rules, and how we should break some of them so we can keep our relationship exciting. Among these rules is role reversals.

We should chase our boyfriends and, in turn, they should play hard to get. While this is something that some couples claim has helped their relationships, it does not mean that you should give it a try in yours, too.

We’ve rounded up eight compelling reasons for you to say pass when it comes to chasing your man because it’s him who should chase you!

1. It’s exhausting

woman dissapointed in her man

Either he’s interested in strengthening your relationship or he’s not. He can’t be in-between. He can’t be undecided. More importantly, it’s just not right to play games (which is what happens when he plays hard to get), especially if you’re serious about him and the relationship.

This does not mean that you should give him an ultimatum. Instead, find time to sit down and talk like two adults.

2. It affects your self-esteem

Yes, you'll certainly find chasing your man thrilling and challenging at first, but what happens when he assumes the role of a hard-to-get and hard-to-please man longer than you think is necessary?

Wouldn't it be a huge blow to your ego? It's not like you need another reason for your self-esteem to go down, right? Thus, it only makes sense to let your man do the chasing.

After all, they've been hardwired to chase what they desire and not to accept defeat. Chasing you will surely give his ego the kind of high it needs from time to time.

3. You miss out on time doing more important things in the relationship

man and woman having problems

Chasing your man and playing games with him is a complete waste of time. You two will be better off doing activities that can help to build and strengthen your bond with each other like going on dates, planning a weekend road trip or doing just about anything that can bring you close to each other's hearts.

Aside from this, it's also important to take note that while the chase helps to keep you and him in your toes, the thrill and excitement it brings will wear off in the long run. Instead, it will be annoying and may lead to misunderstanding, which can cause your relationship to end eventually.

4. You forget that you have needs, too

Your boyfriend acts difficultly and coyly and as a response; you persevere against all odds to get his attention. You know that he's not being reasonable anymore, but your heart says that you should still chase him because making sacrifices and understanding him are all part of the relationship (and you knew that when you signed up for the relationship in the beginning so you can't really complain).

Because you were so busy trying to find ways to make your man notice you, you neglect yourself in the process. This is one of the ugliest downside of chasing him because you should never have to sacrifice your personal needs and sanity just so he will be happy.

5. You become a doormat in the process

woman dissapointed

If you've been chasing your man for a long time now, chances are he thinks you've become desperate for him and your relationship (and you can't really blame him).

When he has this misguided thinking, he will put you to the test to see how far you're willing to go just to please him. The result is that you will put up with all the stupid things he does because you're afraid of showing him that you've given up on the chase.

This then makes you a doormat and, in case you missed it, guys don't love and adore doormats.

6. You lose your sense of self

You forget how you are an independent and strong woman who does not take nonsense from any man. Because your emotions have already overtaken you and you've become obsessed with chasing your man, you forgot who you are and what you deserve.

It's a hard reality that women who have been chasing their partners only realize when it's already too late. So, while you still have time and some self-worth, back off from the chasing game. Let your boyfriend chase you, and if he can't be man enough to do that, maybe he's not really worth it after all.

7. He's not that great of a catch as you've thought

While it's somehow understandable and forgivable if you go crazy over chasing your boyfriend if he's a ten, it's the opposite if he's 5 or less (both in the looks and attitude department).

What will you get from chasing a guy who obviously doesn't deserve a glance from you? Why would you even chase him in the first place? Think about your answers to these questions, then consider why you're even with him if he's not worth your affection at all.

8. Chivalry isn't a part of what you signed up for

woman chasing a man

Your boyfriend has to realize that not everything he needs will be handed to him as if he's a king. If he wants to be treated as one, he will first have to prove that he's worth the queen's trust and affection.

He should prove that he can be a knight in shining armor, always ready to save the queen when she's in distress. He needs to chase her and prove she's worth more than his whole kingdom. When he's succeeded already, only then is he entitled to every perk that comes with being the queen's partner.

Times have changed and men have decided to sit back, relax and let women do the chasing. However, a man who really loves you will not let you shoulder the burden that the chase brings, but rather treat you exclusively to the high it gives.

Stop chasing your man and let him do his thing. You'll surely reap the rewards when you do (and you can thank us then!).

Do you think it's men who should do the chasing? For what other reasons do you think women should never chase their boyfriends? Share your thoughts in the comments.

About the author

Maine Belonio

Maine Belonio is a twenty-something mom and writer who has a penchant for coffee, long distance running, Tolkien, Switchfoot, and Jesus.

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