Masturbation tips for women…you thought you already now everything? There is always more to learn. I don’t know about you, ladies, but I’m a big fan of masturbation! Maybe you were told as a child that it was bad or sinful, or maybe you just feel a little “dirty” when you think of giving yourself pleasure, but I’m going to tell you why you should masturbate. And to make sure you get the most out of it, I’ll share my favorite masturbation tips for women.
I really like and agree what an American sex educator Betty Dodson wrote: “Masturbation is a meditation on self-love. So many of us are afflicted with self-loathing, bad body images, shame about our body functions, and confusion about sex and pleasure, I recommend an intense love affair with yourself”
So, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with masturbation. Everybody does it. And why not? Orgasms can boost your moods, make you feel happier, increase your body confidence, improve the look of your skin, etc. You have no risk of disease, no risk of unwanted pregnancy, no worries about some guy lovin’ and leavin’ ya’, and most importantly, you will have an orgasm. Doctors confirm that sex is good for you. An orgasm makes a woman feel seven years younger! Also, orgasms build up your immune system. (Have you ever been horny when you’re recovering from a bad cold? It’s because your body needs the orgasm for healing purposes.) Orgasms make you feel strong and self-assured, and they send off pheromones that attract the opposite sex. Don’t believe me? Give yourself an orgasm right before you go out on your next date…he’ll notice, believe me.
Most women do not orgasm vaginally. That’s right: They orgasm by clitoral stimulation. While there are plenty of men who are good enough to know how to stimulate a woman’s clitoris properly (either orally or manually), much of the time they don’t.
Some of that is on us. As women, we don’t always know how to teach our guy to stimulate the clit properly because we don’t know ourselves how it should be done…which is exactly why masturbation is so important!
In order to really be truly satisfied in bed, you have to understand your own body. Every woman is different. In addition to small differences in anatomy, there are big differences in the ways we need to be touched. When it comes to understanding your body fully, there’s no substitute for masturbation.
So these are some of the important reasons to masturbate: You’ll learn how to satisfy your body’s cravings so you can achieve better orgasms more often. Better yet, you can share that knowledge with your partner. I could go on and on about the benefits of masturbation, but I’ll save that for a different article. Let’s assume you’re convinced and move on to more practical matters: how to get yourself off.
Here are my top 17 masturbation tips for women. These are proven, time-tested ways to ensure you have an amazing orgasm.
#1 Include Your Partner
Yes, include your partner, don’t be shy! Sex will be even better afterwards, because you will connect on the most intimate level.
Learn how to get your partner to masturbate you the way you like it.
Remember, you’re not necessarily going to give him a step by step verbal guide of how to masturbate and get you off. It’s more about encouraging him to try new things.
Awaken your sexual desires by trying out some of the most common female fantasies. Surprise him and reveal him what else you’d really love to try in bed tonight!
Sense of touch plays a very important part in our romantic, emotional and sexual relationships.
You’re About to Learn Why the Mind Is the Only Erogenous Zone on a Man That Matters…
Even if you’re shy… Even if you’re conservative… If you’re a “Good Girl” who feels this silent need to be just a little naughty…this is something that will make your pleasure even more intense.
Learn how to play his secret desires like a violin. And inspire him to give you everything you’ve ever fantasized about, too.
#2 Masturbate When You’re Alone
Women always tell me they can’t get off when they masturbate because they’re afraid someone in the house will hear them or walk in on them. That’s a valid concern. The fear of being too loud or being caught will stop most of us from giving in to our little “guilty pleasures.”
And that’s a shame. Orgasms can be shy. You’ve got to sneak up on them. Once you’ve scare one away, you may not be able to recapture the mood later when you’re alone.
That’s why I suggest that you masturbate when you are quite sure you are alone. Give it a try, even if you aren’t in the mood. Trying to have sex with a partner when you’re not aroused is usually a bad idea (a seriously bad idea), but trying to masturbate when you’re not in the mood is a good idea. This is how you find out what it takes to get you in the mood!
No matter what else is going on in your day, if you find that the house is empty and you’re alone for a little while, stop what you’re doing and start playing with yourself. Seriously.
#3 Wet Your Finger
When you’re ready to begin, start by licking your finger.
Licking your finger before clitoral stimulation is probably the closest you’ll get to the feeling of oral sex through self-pleasure.
Plus, the wetness touching your clit actually stimulates you to get even wetter.
Everyone needs a bit of lubrication at first, so why not take advantage of nature’s handiest and most natural lube?
Go ahead…get your fingers all wet and slippery before you touch yourself.
Just lick the tip of your finger before clitoral stimulation and you’ll see that it makes all the difference in the speed and strength of your orgasm.
#4 Or…Try With a Lube
Yes, lube can be a good playmate! There are many different kinds of lubricants and they are great for genital massages and masturbation.
Don’t know which one to choose? Natural-based oil lubricants are great! Water-based lubes are also fantastic, but not ideal for water/shower play.
#5 Wake Your Fantasy
So, this is the ideal moment to awaken your secret desires and fantasies.
What do you like, what turns you on. Which sexual pose, what kind of a guy or girl, How do you like to be touched?
What kind of pace do you prefer?
Where would you do it?
I’m a visual person, I like reading it and picturing it in my mind and it helps me reach an orgasm.
Think, girl! Imagine that place, these moves, that person…and let the play begin.
It’s amazing what your imagination can do with just a little bit of outside stimulation. Also, you could well find that you are fulfilling a fantasy on your own.
If I can masturbate and get off by myself in a place or position I’ve always wanted to try, then when it comes time, I know I’ll be able to get off in that same place or position with my partner. Think it as “testing it out”.
#6 Watch (or Read) Porn
I am one of those women who genuinely enjoy porn.
Sometimes I close my eyes and listen to the sounds of sex, and that is enough to arouse me.
Sometimes it takes something a little more visual.
Whatever the case may be, you should give it a try at least once, and probably more than once, as an encouragement and outside source of stimulation.
Also, if you’re new to masturbation and aren’t quite in the mood, porn is a great way to feel like you’re not the only naked person in the room.
That turns out to be a lot more comforting than it sounds.
#7 Explore the Whole Body
Don’t focus solely on your clit, and vagina, explore the whole body. When it comes to masturbation tips for women, it is important to Take your time,. Simulate your nipples, the insides of your thighs , your feet, your ears or neck… there are so many different erogenous zones in our bodies , so pamper yourself like a queen, and take your time to find these zones to multiply pleasure. Do it at your own pace and be patient while discovering your hot spots.
You’ll be surprised that you likely have more of these spots than you know.
There are times when all I want is a quick 30-second release and I know that slow clitoral stimulation is just going to annoy me, so I dive right in at top speed and have fun. You’ll do the same once you know exactly where to touch yourself and what speed works for you.
#8 Go Slowly and Then Build Up
Now that you’ve pulled out the porn and licked your finger, or used these lubricants what’s next? Well, now you begin. Using the tip of your finger, make soft slow circles on the hood of your clitoris.
See how that feels?
Okay, now’s the time to explore. Try different things with your clit. Move your finger up and down, sliding it inside and out of your vagina as you go. Try flicking your clit from side to side or pinching it gently between two fingers. Use different speeds and different amounts of pressure. Increase your speed as you go along (or increase, decrease, then increase again) for an amazing all-out explosion of an orgasm!
Your body will tell you what it likes and what it doesn’t like. If you don’t like something, then move on to something else. It’s that simple. You’re the one in control, so don’t force yourself to like something and don’t pretend to like something. Move on to your next idea instead. It’s all about your pleasure, after all. This is the time to learn where you like to be touched and how you like to be touched.
For example, you can slide a finger (or two or three) into your vagina to simulate penetration by a penis during sex. As you do, try curling your fingers slightly and press against your vaginal wall facing your bladder. About two inches in, you should feel a bit of a bump. That bump is your G-Spot. If you rub your finger up and down on that spot and stimulate it, you’re likely to orgasm like never before.
Can’t find it? Don’t worry, many of us don’t find it at first. Just keep trying.
#9 Don’t Just Lie There
Most of us find that lying flat on our backs, missionary style, is the best way to masturbate. Not only is it the most convenient way when you have toys involved, but it’s also just really easy to lie back and scream in pleasure, isn’t it?
But you owe it to yourself to change things up once in a while. If you want another great position to try, get on your hands and knees (AKA “doggy style”) and masturbate in that position. Believe it or not, there’s something very primal and very, very stimulating about being in that position and pleasuring yourself. As a bonus, it’s great practice for giving yourself clitoral stimulation when you and your man are in that position and you’re not quite getting the full pleasure from it. Try the floor, the stairs, the chair…whatever suits your needs.
#10 Try it With a Toy
Another tip for masturbating is to try it with a toy. Fingers are great, but vibrators and dildos can multiply the pleasure.
And who says you have to do this alone? When you get comfortable enough, you can even masturbate with your partner. Really: Let him watch. This will not only give him some outstanding visual stimulation, but it will also teach him how to touch you…without you having to actually “teach him.” Sneaky, huh?
For now, you’re going to want a vibrator. It’s easy to find articles about choosing the right vibrator – there are several of them right here on this site. Trust me, the right toy can really enhance your masturbation experience.
If you press a vibrator against your clit, you’ll find that the stimulation is much different from when the vibrator is stimulating you vaginally. Have fun with that. Play around and test it which you prefer.
#11 Try it in the Shower
Indoor plumbing is one of modern man’s greatest inventions – and not just for the sake of cleanliness. You know that amazing detachable shower head?
Well, that’s about to become one of your greatest sexual pleasures.
Set the water to your usual preferred warmth.
Remove the shower head and place it close to your clit.
Let the water play against your clitoris and enjoy.
As you get more worked up, move the shower head a little closer, then pull back.
You’ll notice that the difference in distance has an obvious effect on your stimulation. Enjoy!
#12 Use Heat and Cold
Of course, while you’re in the shower, you can always take advantage of the water-temperature knob to change things up a little. Instead of using your normal temperature, make the water colder against your clitoris and see what kind of reaction you have. An ice cube rubbed on your clit during masturbation will have the same fabulous “numbing” effect.
Heat is good too, but don’t risk scalding yourself with hot water. Pick up some heating-effect lube or sex oil and rub it on your vibrator. This oil can be found in just about any sex shop. Now rub the vibe across your clit and see what happens. The friction between the vibrator and your clit makes the oil heat up and makes your orgasm out-of-this-world.
#13 Don’t Force the “O”
If you’re masturbating and you feel like you’re getting nowhere, don’t fret. There are many times you’re not going to get yourself off. Sometimes you’re too stressed, sometimes you can’t find the right kind of stimulation, sometimes doing it alone just isn’t working…the list goes on.
The important thing to remember is that if you’re not able to orgasm, don’t push it. Forcing yourself will only make you more frustrated and make it more difficult to achieve orgasm next time.
It’s okay. Wait this one out and try it again later. I like masturbating really late at night and when I’m just waking up. Half-awake masturbation is ideal for people who tend to overthink things.
#14 Use Both Hands!
One of the best masturbation tips for women I can give you is to use both hands. While one hand is happily playing in your private garden, let the other one explore. Grab your breasts and squeeze your nipples for added sexual pleasure.
Caress your body. Run your free hand slowly up and down your skin. Brush your fingers lightly against your neck and the side of your face. Immerse yourself in your own beautiful sensuality.
Trust me, you are your own best lover…and to be the best lover, you have to love yourself. Love your body. Enjoy your body. And don’t be afraid to play. Masturbation can lead you to lots of pleasure and a new, more confident you.
#15 Experiment With Anal
So, you also want a mind-blowing anal orgasm? Why not? Once you get more experienced you may be adventurous enough to try anal beads, for instance – they’re great for women who are curious but too shy to ask their partners for back-door stimulation. There are some great clitoral toys out there too. You’ll find a full array of options at online sex-toy shops or you local sex store.
Once you’ve completed your usual ritual of masturbation, you’ll be prepared for more fun.
Beginning with a finger-sized plug is a good place to start. You can use vibrating plugs to create more sensation than you could physically generate, Bring out the high-quality lubricant and relax. Set the mood and, for beginning, try doing it in the shower.
#16 Combo Pack
Don’t forget, if you feel like it, you don’t have to concentrate on one orgasm zone at a time. You can use both hands to rub your clit while fingering yourself. Maybe you’ll prefer using various toys at the same time. Sky’s the limit! I still adore the Rabbit, the veteran of the sex toy world, that stimulates both the G-spot and the clitoris at the same time. What’s your favorite sex toy for maximum pleasure?
#17 Strengthen the vaginal muscles to Intensify Orgasms
How to Achieve A More Powerful Orgasm Every Time? It’s possible.
Read as much as you can, and try to strengthen the vaginal muscles in order to intensify orgasms and increase the desire for sex. How to do that ?
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What do you think about these masturbation tips for women work best for you? Share your experience with me.
Ok so I’m 13. Is it bad to masturbate right now?
Not at all, it’s normal
Don’t worry I’m 14 and feel about the same it’s pretty standard plus many boys start masturbating at like 11 or 12 so why should it be weird for us at 13 or 14
Can we do together
No not at all.You should explore yourself, it helps you with stress and confidence !
this the same advice that everyone knows! Get your clit stimulated to arousal then make small smacks ” spank the monkey” very quick and fast with the pointer and middle fingers. Test how hard you like it then go from there! Good luck ladies!
Im 14 and i’ve been masturbating since last year…its just amazing and only God knows how much i enjoy it….every three hours i feel like i need to masturbate. Is that fine? And how can i masturbate during my periods? Please help
Im 14 also. And every 3 hours is odd. I do it almost 1 everyday though. But when ur on your period a great way to masturbate is in the shower. When your in water while on your period the blood flow stops.
You can masturbate normally during ur periods
It’s normal. I do when my husband is away.
Okay so I’m 12 is it okay to masturbate…I haven’t has sex or anything of course so will it still have the same impact
i want to masturbate harder
Hi, so I’m SUPER YOUNG (turning 12 this year) I masturbated MANY times (I’m a virgin and I haven’t got my period) is that OK? And how do I pleasure my self more? (I watched an anime named Boku No Pic and she used a banana as a penis) And lol, I can’t find my clitoris… Help!!
Wow, looking at all these comments, it feels good not being alone.
Yea no I’m 20 and IV had sex going on for three years now and I NEVER new how to masterbate I had to rub my cl*t so hard till I had a orgasm. Even that gets boring! IV looked up different ways to masterbate ( until I get my d*ldo of course) and this article helped so much man! I put cold water on my hands and went down to the garden. Literally this helped, thank so much.
I like your tips. Will love to receive newsletters
Amazing tips, thank you!
I love masturbating & Im Bisexual
Me too babe
Wow. Your tips really helped me. i felt more comfortable with these things, and I found out new things about myself. I hope that my girlfriend and I, (yes, I am a lesbian, please do not judge my life choices.) can try this together sometime. Thanks so much.
How do I masturbate for longer period of time.help please.
Reading these comments makes me feel so much better because I am 12 and sometimes like almost every night I feel like I want to masterbate and I do but I want to do it better however I feel like I am too young but idk and I have not got my period yet I am a late comer like my grandmother but guys help idk what to doooo 🙏🏻😩
Is there a “proper” way to do it? My body is used to the basic one finger (tactic where you rub next to your clit with one finger) and I’m told it’s wrong
There is no wrong way to do it, you should just go with whatever pleasures you the most
ive tried to masturbate plenty of times and finger myself but it just feels not exiting or enjoyable( it gives me no sensation) when i secretly watch por n i cross my feet over eachother and tense my thighs together till it reaches a surten pleaser point and then i relax and then let out a moan it feels so great
i just want to know is it normal and what is it called?
plz help <3
So this is gonna sound weird, but I’m almost 35 and I don’t have a first memory of masterbating. I literally remember being six years old doing and earlier but I don’t know when the first time was. But I’ve almost always done it pretty much the same way… on my stomach laying very straight, with both hands and my toes pointed. Tensing my leg muscles changes the feeling and I use primarily my right hand with my left on top of my right adding pressure. And then I kinda jus roll my hand kinda like when u put ur hand out the window of a moving car. Starting at my palm then rolling to my finger tips. Usually took me literally less than five minutes to get myself off(not exaggerating either) but then I had a brain tumor about 7 years ago and since then I can’t do it like before. My feet and toes cramp now, I run out of breath right before I’m about to get it, and it takes me forever. I still have yo be on my stomach and I CAN get myself off, it just feels like I’m starting from the beginning where as before i could literally be done in a minute and a half. And also I never needed a vibrator where as now sometimes I can’t get there if I don’t have one. …. that’s my story, thanks for reading.
Reading the comments made me feel so much better about myself, I remember a friend telling me about trying to masterbate, and I was like “no way it’s weird” however something recently happened that changed my mind 360°, 2 days ago I dreamt about having sex ( I’m a Virgin ), and I woke up feeling super horny and wanting to have s*x more than anything, so I just started pleasing my 🐱, and I found myself unknowingly sticking my fingers inside my virginia, it felt so good that I started doing it almost 3 times a day.
I never got caught and never will because I cover my whole body with my blanket, my mom walked in on me while doing it and she didn’t suspect anything.
I really recommend trying to masterbate if you’re too young to have s*x but have an unpleasant pleasure to have s*x.