Should I Shave My Pubic Hair for Oral Sex?

Should you shave your pubic hair? Here are some thoughts and experiences to help you decide.

Oral sex is such an intimate and pleasurable experience. It is also one that can make you feel quite vulnerable, especially with a new partner. We don’t know what our new guy is used to seeing! The question is should I shave my pubic hair? We’ll help you decide.

It’s not like you can just ask him – “Oh by the way, was your ex-girlfriend a waxer or a full-bush kinda gal?” I mean, you’d rather not think about his ex full stop. It’s not that you want to replicate her pubic ‘do’, but the fact is that like women, men have their preferences.

If they’re used to one thing, and then you open up your legs and he’s faced with another, you’re going to notice his er… curious hesitation.

Perhaps you are already in a sexual relationship and he wants to go down on you, but only if you shave or wax your pubic hair. Shouldn’t he appreciate you for who you are? Or should you be open to a bit of experimentation and compromise? It does grow back after all.

Removing your pubic hair is a very personal decision though, and whether it grows back or not isn’t really the point. You have to think about why you are considering doing it, if it isn’t something you would normally do. Is it for you? It should be!

You may want to make your boyfriend happy. You are the one who is going to have to deal with all of the regrowth hell and drama. This can cause of much unnecessary sexual insecurity and hindrance than it’s worth.

So in asking yourself the question “Should I shave my pubic hair?”, here are things you should consider:

Why Do Women Shave and Wax Their Pubic Hair?

Should I Shave My Pubic Hair

Mostly do it for aesthetic and hygiene reasons. Depending on where you are from your pubic hair might be more thick and wild than other women, and keeping it down simply makes you feel more fresh and er… ready for action!

Other women preen their mounds because they prefer the way it looks when it’s kept neat and short. Some women are the opposite and let it do it’s thing because they prefer the natural look. Either way it should be about what makes you feel more feminine or womanly.

There are women who like to remove all of their pubic hair because they enjoy receiving oral sex from their partners and want their partners to be able to see exactly what they are doing! Some men prefer less or no hair because it’s a bit naughty and allows them to live out private fantasies.

Mostly, if a man has expressed to you that he prefers a woman who waxes, it is probably due to hygiene and both of you feeling confident for him to go down on you.

Pros and Cons

Regrowth nightmares and the horror of ingrown hairs… I decided to speak to a variety of females to get the bigger picture. There are more women than you might think who suffer from irritation around their pubic mound and all of the mental stress that goes with it.

One woman described her shaving experiences to me. This woman has quite course hair that curls and she complains that every time she shaves around her pubic area it causes irritation. Most of the time she will end up with one or two ingrown hairs that end up causing her weeks of sexual insecurity, because the skin becomes infected and inflamed. There’s no way my man is going down there when I’m looking like that! She exclaims. I asked her why she bothers shaving, and she said it’s because her partner won’t go down on her otherwise.

It seems pretty strange to me that oral sex is either denied because he won’t go down unless she has shaved. Sometimes she simply won’t let him go down because she has shaved and caused ingrown hairs!

Another woman I spoke to told me that her partner prefers her waxed, so she suggested he pay for her beauty appointment every month. Well I’m doing it for him, so why should I have to pay for it? That mounts up you know! She said comically.

I asked her if she minds doing it. She said, sure it was painful at first, but the results were nice, so I got used to it. Plus, the more frequently you do it, the easier and less painful it is because the hair grows back finer and there is less and less to remove. I certainly like the idea of putting the bill at his door!

Guy’s approval

I was seeing a man who specifically told me that pubic hair didn’t bother him at all, In fact he prefers a woman not to shave because it is her naturalness and self-confidence that turns him on! Lucky me eh? I took full advantage of the freedom and I loved it!

The only good thing I can think of about hair removal is feeling fresher between the legs, especially during the summer months; not having to worry about people spotting stray hairs on your bikini line when going swimming; and feeling more confident about receiving oral sex because of your partner’s preferences and also your own personal hygiene hang-ups.

When I compare these things to the physical and mental stress many women go through removing pubic hair, it makes me wonder why the guy’s approval is so important. One girl has even described to me how she is so ashamed now of the marks and scars she has acquired from ingrown hair issues. Now she wears make-up on her pubic hair mound when she knows she will be receiving oral sex!

We need to love and respect our natural bodies more, and only do what we want to do, for ourselves. If you love and respect your natural body, then your man is likely to love and respect your body more, too.

Pubic Hair Removal Tips

Should I Shave My Pubic Hair for Oral Sex?

If you do decide to remove your pubic hair, here are some things to consider…

  1. If you are shaving, it is always advised to use a single blade razor. Shave in the direction of the hair growth.A cleaner shave is going to increase the risk of ingrown hairs and skin irritation.
  2. Gently exfoliate the area to tease out hair from under the skin before they become a problem.
  3. Consider trimming your pubic hair rather than shaving it. You can achieve a very neat and almost-bare look without all the nasty regrowth issues this way.
  4. Make sure you moisturize using a non-perfumed moisturizing cream, avoiding the genitals.
  5. If you just want to tidy up your bikini-line get used to tweezing any stray hairs.
  6. Always get a wax done by a professional.
  7. Be very careful when using depilatory creams. You don’t want to get the cream anywhere near your genitals. This area is far too sensitive and it will swell up big time! If you decide to shave your bikini area, find more tips in our step by step guide.
  8. Try anything once, but stand your ground if you’re not happy with the results or side effects – it’s your vagina!
  9. If your boyfriend refuses to go down on you because you won’t shave, offer a compromise. Tell him that you will shave if he shaves his balls!
  10. If you want to stay completely natural always make sure you have a shower. Be completely fresh when your boyfriend gives you oral sex.
  11. Don’t give him a reason to be reluctant.

Do you shave your pubic hair? Share your thoughts with us,

11. Sexual Hygiene

\No matter if you prefer shaving or not, maintain sexual hygiene. If you wax, go to a location with a good reputation for cleanliness and hygienic conditions. It doesn’t hurt to use the washes sometimes even if you don’t want to use them every day.

Since sexual activity may be a source of UTIs, it is vital to understand that there are many things you can do before and after sex to prevent them.
It’s important to urinate after having oral sex and  this rule doesn’t solely apply to vaginal intercourse. Use lubricated condoms since wearing condoms without lubrication or without any lubricant at all can irritate the skin and transmit bacteria. If you don’t have any infection, you really only need some soap and water down there to keep yourself clean and fresh.  However, If your vagina doesn’t smell and taste good, don’t panic, there is a solution.

Do you shave your pubic hair? Share your thoughts with us,

About the author

Scarlett Robinson

I am inspired by the ways people interact. Human behaviour and emotions are wonderfully complex, and I want to dig deeper and understand more. This is why I explore intimate relationships in my writing. (I’m also ever so slightly kinky.)


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  • Wonderful and insightful article.

    I’m comfortable either way; the “de-nuded” girlfriend has a few less interruptions during the act; because we are not picking an odd hair out of our mouths before they get sucked into our throats or lungs; but I like either.

    I once dated a woman who was Native American; she had the, well; “most forrested” private regions that I have ever seen.

    And it seems that they; or at least she; have deeply rooted coverage in those areas; because her lack of shaving or trimming never caused a delay or an interruption in the completion of the act.

    I like them natural; but I can deal with what you present me; gladly.

    Nice blog; BTW.

      • My guy shaved me but prefers to shave himself. Quite frankly I dont like being shaved its too sensitive down there and Im not looking forward to ingrown hairs and soreness. Let your lady grown but keep it nicely trimmed!

  • I say shave it. If you find you don’t like it grow it back. You never know you might find you like it. That’s what happened to me. I shaved just to give it a try and I like it. I’m shaved and have been for some time now.

    • Same, Jeff! I ended up shaving for my boyfriend cause he wouldn’t have sex otherwise and I ended up loving it, the bareness looks and feels so much better personally.

  • Don’t go bare. TRIM the hair and shave the sides.

    Hair INCREASES pleasure. Hasn’t anyone (men & women) noticed that even the slightest movement of pubic hair is felt by the body?

    Pubic hair is related to arrector pili muscles which contracts and allows the body to feel sensation.

    If you don’t believe me, next time you go bare, remove the hair with wax so that entire hair is removed from the root. Then try to make yourself feel sensation on the mound.

    Next, let your pubic hair grow a bit and try again to make yourself feel sensation on the mound.

    See the difference? Chances are you felt more sensation WITH hair.

    • Yes I wanted to talk about this but didn’t know much about it but I experienced this! But I mean think about girls that like the hair on their head pulled lol

  • My ex often hinted that he wanted me to shave before he would perform oral on me. It was a moot point, though, I was too self conscious back then and never let him down there. My current boyfriend is fine with whatever I do, never a complaint. I shaved completely bald once, and felt so weird and exposed (not worth the unpleasant re growth either!). I’m fine with trimming it, but I’m keeping my foliage. :)

  • I have trouble seeing the problem of shaving for your partner as long as he asks you respectfully. Of course, it’s not right if he pressures you into it, but when asked nicely one can at least consider it. And yes, I am shaven myself – on the request of my wife who is not shaven herself, no problem at all since she asked respectfully!

  • I’m of an italian descent and my lady garden is quite full so i keeep myself part shaved/waxed, i have a close puffy labia so just the hair from there is removed and leaving the rest natural… so getting the both of two worlds.

    • My wife is the bushy one because of coarse ingrown hairs whereas I have been shaving smooth for years as i have fine soft hair. I began doing this at her request (insistance?) as she like the feel and smooth bare look on me. Not a big problem for us but just curious what laser costs? Do you know if a male can use laser treatment too?

    • You are right on Carla! I’ve had many laser treatments on that area and am very hairless which I feel very sexy that way. The only way to go!

  • Do what makes you comfortable. If you’re unsure, just try it. If you like it, keep doing it. If not, then let it grow and stay natural or trimming is another option. Whatever you do though, make sure it makes you happy and it’s what you want.

  • It feels me really seducive when my wife joins me on bed without hair. I use to shave her hair as and when we desire.. I think hair removers is better option than to shave….

  • I am 46 and have kept mine completely bare for many years. In my early twenties most of my guy friends liked the clean look, so after a while I only felt comfortable being fully shaved. Later had complete laser hair removal down there and go in for touchups on occasions. I have no hair at all in that area and I love the sexy feeling.

    • My personal experience when I dated ladies that were natural they were not comfortable with oral sex, but other ladies I dated preferred to be fully bald as they enjoyed oral sex and was comfortable with it. So it all depends on what her preference’s are and what she really likes and enjoys. I am not particular at all when it comes ladies, but they usually will tell you what they prefer and really want

  • I like general maintenance of the area to keep it looking neat. I like the look of a small triangle patch of hair, clean all around. If my partner is female, as long as it is clean, I’m fine with any variety. But in terms of having a partner who *tells* you how it’s supposed to look, that just irks me and makes me question our compatibility. Unless he’s going to be doing the same amount of maintenance on himself, there’s no rational reason for me to consider going the extra mile for him. BJ’s are as much of a luxury as eating out is. Sex is a big part of closeness and intimacy. My bf refusing to go down on me would really just kill the relationship for me.

  • I have a puffy labia I keep myself part waxed/shaved i leave the rest alone best of both so to say.. still getting the closeness from oral sex.

  • This article seems a bit too whiney to me. Like she’s trying to turn this into some women’s rights issue. When I became sexually active my freshman year of college, at first I didn’t care about a woman shaving cause I was simply fascinated with seeing a real life vagina. Had 2 poor experiences with hair in my mouth, so I stopped performing oral unless my GF was at least trimmed. My first GF didn’t like giving oral, bit liked receiving so I didn’t have to deal with shaving.

    2 of my consequent 3 other GFs wanted me at least trimmed low if I wanted to receive oral. I’m black, so my hair is naturally curly. When I wasn’t shaving properly, I did get the razor bumps. But once I got the hang of it, it was fine.

    It just seems like the authors trying to brand men who want their ladies shaved/trimmed as villains. Obviously being a forceful a-hole is wrong, but a shaving/trimming request isn’t.

    • Its really irritating to have oral sex with un-shaved. The great pleasure lies with in there and both sex partner can attract and enjoy in depth. I prefer to have oral sex with shaved. But it is not possible to have sex with opposite partner, shaved all the time. I adjust sometime, but the real beauty blooms with shaved beauty inside.

      Cheer with clean..

  • I have read here that different people have different likes.
    I like it shaved. Usually my girlfriends want me to shave them. This is part of the arousing game.

    And not only for oral sex, but for massage, and caressing, too. Apparently, ladies feel better when bald and having their beautiful inner legs being being massaged, caressed, and labia pulling. Although I find cameltoes to be beautiful with hair, but when it comes to eaten them, I need them shaved.

    One of the things with hairy mounds is those hairs that tend to get stuck in our throats.

    Up to where I have experienced, my ladies love being shaved. And they find my shaved manhood enticing and delicious. Girls get man’s hair stuck in their throats, too.

    Secret: spread some edible oil on your manhood with your partners favorite flavor, and you won’t have to ask again. They even go down their without asking for your permission.

    And for those girls that can’t have an orgasm while being penetrated or that takes them a long time to reach one while having a male organ inside them, nothing more pleasuring than having their shaved mounds eaten, massaged, caressed, described. Yes, some ladies love to hear how beautiful that area of theirs is.

    I am a hairy man in that area, and I have been used to having it shaved. This is for cleanliness, specially, around the back hole and in the front to avoid my lady getting hair in their throats.

    One has to be very careful shaving the b*lls. I don’t know if Brazilian wax and/or laser could be safe in that area. I wish I had been born hairless. But hair regrowth doesn’t bother me, it’s the ball shaving.

    I have always the job of shaving myself and shaving my lady.


    A guy that wants his lady to always be happy!

  • I’m male, 27. I prefer a nice full bush, all natural, but that choice is up to my gf. I don’t want to push her in any direction.

    Before her, I had a gf, who stopped shaving because of my preference. The result was not only a beautiful dark bush, but it also made our sex much better. Don’t know how to explain it best, but it created some extra options, like investigating her pubes, playing them, before going further down.

    And, there’s the pheromone-thing. Pubes do actually have a function. They help spreading your natural fragrances. It’s a connection between sexual partners.
    That’s a possible (more) scientific explanation for what I experienced with that woman.

    Of course there’s always a way in between… the landing strip, some or another figure, bikini line, etc. All good options for a compromise I guess.

    Very very good article btw.

  • What a strange dilemma. I have never heard of a guy refusing to go down on a woman because she doesn’t wax down there. Sounds like something woman cook up in their heads. Personally, I don’t mind if it is shaved or not. I have a slight preference for woman keep at least some hair down there so they don’t look like a child. I prefer it shaved over waxed because the idea of them working on it in the shower feels naughty which I like. Two things I really don’t like are: when a woman smells down there like she hasn’t washed in a while and when woman are so self conscious that they can’t enjoy themselves. If you don’t feel comfortable with hair, do what you have to do. Otherwise, I love all lower-lady hair styles equally. Btw, hair never makes it difficult to find the clit. It is always in the same place. I can find it in the dark.

  • I’m a natural girl.The only places I shave are legs and armpits.I don’t even use that lots of make up that other women do-only eyeliner and a lipgloss.That will be it.I love being natural and I shaved down there once, but hell, I loathed it.I felt like a significant part of me was gone…so I let the hair grow back and won’t ever get rid of it again.
    If a man will ever ask me to shave, I will break up with him.It’s my body and I get that men have different tastes.But sure thing there are men out there who love natural women.

  • Of course shave it all or better laser.
    I will perform oral sex only with smooth lady. Bush is in the past and looks crazy.

  • Both me & my wife shave / wax it’s far better than having to deal with the bushes. We both enjoy being smooth for one other it makes giving & receiving oral sex much more pleasurable which we both enjoy giving to one another very much! Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it! A couple of smoothies.

  • My opinion is that she should do whatever she’d like without considering the man’s preferences. If a man wants a woman to shave (and he’s willing to shave himself) then I won’t stop her, but at the end of the day this should be her decision. I personally would never ask a woman to shave because I feel that it’s her body and she should do what she’d like with it. I’d perform oral either way.

    Plus, I know I wouldn’t want to shave if someone asked, so it seems unfair to have that expectation of others. She also would have no way of knowing a guy’s preferences before they talk about it, so it doesn’t seem worth it to change to a style you don’t prefer based on an assumption.

  • Sexual hygiene was mentioned several times in having pubes? I was told by my gyno hair protects the vagina and hair repels sweat and dirt. My husband loves to give oral and is turned on by hair at the moment but I still feel self-conscious or like I should do some trimming. He’s also amazing in the fact he likes a sweaty face sitting session so I’m one lucky lady. I could use a little more confidence in rocking that position