Tired of having so-so orgasms that are barely a blip on your pleasure radar? Want an experience that is more passionate, more satisfying and much more erotic? Read on to discover how to have the best orgasm of your life.
An orgasm a day keeps stress, anger and irritation at bay. Fact or fiction? The experts say fact! Besides feeling un-freaking-believable, orgasms can help you sleep better, reduce junk food cravings, burn calories (woo hoo!), relieve tension, increase your pain tolerance and help you feel calmer.
But how many of us actually get to experience toe-curling, back-arching, moan-inducing orgasms that register a tempting ten on the pleasure Richter scale? … The sound of crickets is deafening right now. Never fear, YouQueen is here! We’ve collected the greatest tips, tricks and even tools to help you move from go to orgasmic whoa in no time. So, sit back, enjoy and learn how to amp up your orgasms.
Let go of your expectations
We’ve all seen the movies and read the books where a couple sails into bed on a sultry erotic breeze, all the while tearing each other’s clothes off, before launching head (or other body parts) first into a rip-roaring orgasm. Yawn, can you pass the popcorn? These types of scenes are so full of B.S. that they should be permanently banned from public consumption. Sure, you might have had that experience. Once. But more than likely, your route to pleasure highway was a little different.
In fact, all of our pleasure highway jaunts are different. You’re unique and your sexual journey is unique too. We don’t all experience the same sensations or like the same things – and why should we? In fact, it’s highly likely that each and every one of your orgasms are unique too!
So let go of your expectations. Unless Hollywood is involved in one of your fantasies, it and its B.S. content needs to be left out of the bedroom. Expect the unexpected. Don’t feel like your orgasm has to be in sequential order of 1 – 2 – 3 – go! Let it happen, naturally. And don’t judge yourself or your reactions along the way.
It’s all in your head, baby
How do you approach sex and orgasms? Is it something that needs to be ticked off your to-do list, like going for a daily jog? Or is it more of an apple a day type of deal, where you know you should have it, and you even buy apples with completely good intentions … but then you never end up eating them?
Generally speaking, most of us don’t always see orgasms as the pleasurable, enjoyable experiences that they really are. We reluctantly sidle into the bedroom with expectations, fears, worries and concerns burdening our minds. We worry that we won’t perform, that our partner doesn’t find us attractive, that we don’t have enough time and that our body isn’t reacting the way it should.
But just like we wouldn’t cruise from a pressure-packed boardroom meeting or a crappy performance appraisal straight into a deep, peaceful sleep, you shouldn’t expect to enjoy some sexy time while your mind isn’t bringing it’s best A-game. You need to leave your emotional baggage far, far away, from the bedroom. If you want to take it somewhere, hike it over your shoulder and haul it to a friend’s place where you can all go out, have some cocktails and talk that junk over. But leave that emotional trunk out, I repeat, out of the bedroom.
How you feel and what you are thinking is crucial to how pleasurable your sexual experiences end up being. If you want to enjoy the best orgasm of your life, you must make every effort to stay calm, positive and relaxed before and during sexy time. Leave stress, anxiety and pressure outside. Light some candles, lock the door and switch off your bedside clock and phone. This is your time when nothing or nobody (unless you want them to) can intrude.
Get in the mood
Okay, now that all of that negative ju-ju is away from you and your lovely lady lumps, the next step is to foster the right mood. And by right, I mean sexy as all heck. Once you’ve entered your sexy sanctuary, you should be in a neutral, calm and relaxed state. From here, you need to turn up the heat and get your love juices flowing.
If you want to have an awesome orgasm, you’ll need to establish the right environment. Find things that turn you on and that make you feel seductive. Wear something that you feel confident and sexy in. Put on some music and make sure you’re somewhere you feel comfortable. Maybe even dab your favorite scent onto your wrists and the nape of your neck.
If you’re going solo, why not read a sexy book or watch something that makes your downstairs tingle deliciously? It doesn’t have to be hardcore erotica or porn, but you’ll increase the chances of getting in the right mood if you have some visual or mental stimulation.
And if you’re searching for the big O (oh, oh, oh, oh!) together, why not try giving each other a full body massage with some scented massage oil? You can also talk to each other and describe your fantasies and how you’re feeling.
By the way, all of this lusty action doesn’t have to take place in the bedroom either. You can turn anywhere into orgasm central, so keep an open mind and go with what feels good and comfortable for you.
Journey to the center of the earth
Now comes the fun stuff! Once you’ve created a seriously sultry mood, you’ll want to kick-start the action. To begin with, think of yourself as sailing off on a maiden voyage. Your task? To adventure through an in-depth exploration of your body’s deepest whims, desires, wants and needs.
As you know, we’re all so incredibly unique. So what turns on another girl isn’t guaranteed to turn you on. Which is why there are no rules for your maiden voyage. Just follow what feels right and good. Start off slow and experiment with different pressures, speeds and movements. And remember, you’re not just one giant vagina so explore other areas of your body too. Some fun erogenous zones to play with are your breasts, neck, inner thighs, behind your knees and your butt.
Your goal is to learn what you like. If you’re not quite sure what’s happening downstairs, why not check it out? Grab a mirror and watch while you explore. Learn which areas you like being touched and which areas leave you feeling a bit bored. It’s all about trial and error and learning more about yourself.
Clits where it’s at
Okay you crazy kids, it’s time to start looking at the big bang theory for your mind-blowing orgasm. The reality is that if you’re aiming on an experience that rocks your world, you’ll need to focus your attention on flicking the bean.
Now you might be lucky enough to be one of those girls that can orgasm via sex. Or, you might be like everyone else who can only reach their peak through clitoral stimulation. The clitoris has the highest concentration of nerve endings though, so if you’re looking for an amazing 0, I’d focus your attention there.
There are three ways to stimulate your clit: through oral sex, by stroking or rubbing or with a vibrator. Any three ways will work so it’s all about finding what tickles your clitoral pickle so to speak. You can try varying types of pressure, rubbing from side to side or rubbing up and down. Most experts suggest sticking to the one motion once you’ve found the right one for you and then being consistent with the speed.
For a sure-fire O boost, try pulling back your clitoral hood with one hand and gently using the index finger of the opposite hand to stroke your clit. This will heighten the sensitivity of your clit and your overall experience.
Here are a few ideas to get you thinking outside of the box
Yes, the g-spot actually does exist! Now some say that the g-spot is actually part of the female prostrate while others surmise that it’s an extension of the clitoris. Whatever, we don’t care what it is; we just know it feels awesome and for some women stimulation of the g-spot can prompt powerful orgasms. World’s best orgasm? Coming your way. No pun intended. Okay, maybe it was a little intended.
To find the g-spot the sexperts advise using a ‘come hither’ motion with your index and middle finger. You’ll need to insert your fingers until you feel an area on your upper, front vagina wall. It’s around one to three inches in and feels like a little bean-shaped area.
If you’re having trouble finding it straight away, don’t panic or feel disappointed. You might not get it on the first shot, but the good thing is that you get to give it another try tomorrow!
G Spot Stimulation Techniques
The G Spot is located within the vagina wall, not on the surface, so depending on the person, the thickness of the wall will effect how sensitive you are to being touched there. Your G Spot is within the same area as your urethral tube, so pressing it can also stimulate that urge to pee.
Ask your guy to stimulate your G Spot with a firm ‘tapping’ motion. If you are not feeling much, ask him to apply more pressure. It can help for him to gently massage the area on the outside of your body with his other hand that is directly parallel – I’m talking about the hairy area just above your pubic bone. This can intensify the effect.
If you’re feeling up to the challenge, try combining clitoral stimulation with g-spot stimulation. It can be a little tricky to master at first so you might need a hand (or another hand, wink wink) to get the maneuver right. Basically, in a nutshell you want to be pulling up your clitoral hood while stroking your clitoris softly with one hand, and massaging your g-spot with the other. Sounds kind of like patting your head while rubbing your belly, but the results are much more pleasurable.
Get Him to Masturbate You the Way You Like It
There are ways you can get your guy to masturbate you the way you like it. Without literally showing him your whole self-masturbation routine from a birds-eye angle, if what he’s doing right now isn’t really rocking your world.
You can also teach a guy about the different feelings you get when he touches you in different ways just by guiding his fingers under the covers and talking him through.
Awaken your sexual desires by trying out some of the most common female fantasies. Surprise him and reveal him what else you’d really love to try in bed tonight!
If you’re keen on having an awesome orgasm during sex, there are a few positions that can increase your chances of success. Here are five of our favorites.
- The modified missionary is where the man adjusts his position after penetration so he is shifted forward to rub against the woman’s clitoris.
- Doggie style is awesome because it gives you the freedom to angle yourself to where it feels best for you. Either of you can also stimulate your clit at the same time, increasing your chances of orgasm dramatically.
- The pinner position occurs when you flip onto your belly and your man enters you from behind. From here, you can reach between your body and the bed to stimulate your clit.
- Woman on top is a great move where you get to take control of the speed and pressure. You also get the benefit of seeing your man’s eyes light up as you move on top of him.
- The perch is a move where your partner gets to sit in a chair while you, surprise surprise, perch on top facing away from him. You can rub your clit and he gets good access to your breasts.
Top Masturbation Tips
If you are in a mood to do it alone….and curious about increasing your pleasure… these masturbation tips for women are guaranteed to satisfy you.
There is always more to learn.
How to Achieve A More Powerful Orgasm Every Time? It’s possible.
Read as much as you can, and try to strengthen the vaginal muscles in order to intensify orgasms and increase the desire for sex.
Don’t forget the turtle and the hare
Finally, remember that having an orgasm isn’t a race, it’s a journey. So don’t forget to take it slow and enjoy yourself on your orgasm journey. Avoid focusing on the goal (world’s best orgasm? Tick!) and instead just savor the sensations and feelings that you have while in the moment. You’re much more likely to enjoy yourself and induce the world’s best orgasm if you’re not laying there waiting for it to arrive.
See, orgasms aren’t as difficult or as mind-boggling to achieve as you may think. In the right environment, with the right attitude and the right technique you’ll be singing a sweet O soprano in no time. So take your time and enjoy the ride!
so, why can we only stimulate our G-spots once a day?