When it comes to your sex life, or life in general, you don’t want to do the same thing all the time, so here are some new ideas that will ignite the fire between you and your beau. You might laugh, and hopefully, you won’t pull a muscle.
These acrobatic maneuvers will get your core toned, build leg muscles and give you some good cardiovascular exercise. Use these sexual positions in 50 Shades of Grey to keep your heart healthy and your relationship strong.
A good relationship continues to explore intimacy, and to make it work long-term, your relationship needs to be fun. Break free from the shackles of boring intimacy and find your inner she-beast. While I don’t agree with women being treated as sex slaves or signing contracts, I do think our culture needs to talk about sex in healthy ways.
We are healing from years of sexual oppression and people shouldn’t be embarrassed to talk about the most natural thing in life. It shouldn’t be a shameful thing, and if you don’t talk about it, you’ll never learn. So try to keep an open mind.
1. Their first time
For their first time, Christian and Anastasia went with old faithful, missionary style. Let’s break it down. Your man is lying on top of you and that’s about it. While this is cute, because you can actually look into each other’s eyes, it can be a bad habit to get into. Do yourself a favor and make it a rule that you aren’t allowed to have sex in the bed.
That will keep you from being lazy in your sex life. You will need to be creative and develop your leg and core muscles more if you aren’t just lying down. Come on ladies, the goal is to kill two birds with one stone and lose some weight. We women are all about multi-tasking, right? So use your noggin and come up with new ideas.
This position is also called neck to neck or love hug. Put your legs up and congratulations, you’ve now tried the leaping frog. Why they have such funny names, I’m not sure.
The opposite position, another common one, is with the woman on top. This is often called cowgirl, facing straddle or hopping bunny. Bet you didn’t know there were so many terms for this. Just as in any subject of research, once you start learning, you realize how much you don’t know.
While this isn’t in the movie, it’s nice to mention because often it works better for women. If you turn around you’ll definitely get a real leg workout too. Say: sorry honey, I have to get my workout in today, I’m sure he’ll understand when you insist on doing the rodeo as it’s called.
2. Repurposing attire
The whole movie is about the color grey which is signified by Christian’s last name and his grey ties. He uses those grey ties to tease Anastasia, to play games, and tie her wrists above her head. Sometimes he just holds her wrists up or he attaches them to something.
Obviously, something like this requires a lot of trust and you should only do these things with people you know REALLY well. Of course, he always asks her if it’s ok and if it’s too tight on her wrists. This can go both ways though; the woman should not be stuck feeling like she’s not in control.
Just make it fun and don’t do anything dangerous with hot wax or something for Pete’s sake. I’d rather you wear a sombrero and a fake mustache than feel like you need to harm yourself or your partner for pleasure. That whole hurting each other thing is a terrible idea if you ask me, and it leads you down the wrong road.
Focus on making each other laugh, being playful and surprising each other. If you’re using the tie to cover the eyes, just make sure it’s not expensive because it’s hard to get makeup out of silk. There’s no question that a new dress or a fancy blazer can make you look at each other in a new light.
If you put some effort into looking nice for your man and encourage him not to just wear his high school sweatpants every night, it might stimulate more intimacy.
You can also secure your legs at the ankles if you’re really getting creative. If you want to look up some more ideas, check out our other articles on kinky ideas and more positions in our love in bed section.
3. Bubble bath time
Nothing says ‘I love you’ like a nice sponge bath. In the movie, Christian shows he’s letting his guard down when he gets close in that beautiful tub in the immaculately designed bathroom. Let your partner relax and maybe offer a nice back massage.
Maybe book a fun getaway at a non-generic hotel that has a cool design element. Change up your scenery and let the art around you inspire you.
You can prepare by getting some scented candles, a nice smelling bubble bath and finding a good playlist. Make it a regular thing that you both look forward to and turn something that’s repetitive, like bathing, into something that brings you closer together. You’ll be able to relax and have good conversations in the privacy of your tub.
4. The second most common position
The second most common sexual position is portrayed in the movie in two ways. Standing tiger crouching dragon is a fun pose you won’t want to miss. Also called ‘stand and deliver,’ the typical doggie style can be done standing or kneeling. It’s really complicated ok, so pay attention. The woman turns around. That’s it.
If you haven’t tried that, you probably need to go take a class or read a whole book about intimacy, because you might be really behind on your sex game. It’s called doggie style ladies, and it’s an amateur move so don’t be scared to try it. It doesn’t take any flexibility; just think of yourself as a table, a sexy table!
5. Piano style
Christian’s piano isn’t just there for looks; it has a useful bench for sitting. Anastasia sits on his lap facing him in an intimate embrace. See how they got creative and didn’t limit their intimacy to the bed? You are going to start seeing the possibilities in new places, so get ready. Oh, and if you haven’t seen the movie, go see it!
This brings up the other aspect of music, use it. Music can help you relax and can definitely affect your mood. If you’re playing children’s music all the time, no wonder your love life is dead. When the kids go to bed, switch up the playlist!
This pose is called lotus as you do kind of look like a flower. It’s also called yogi or pretzel because of how your legs intertwine. This is a pose depicted in lots of art and is very intimate because you are heart to heart.
6. Bedposts aren’t just for decoration
Bedposts can be good to hold onto for stability. I mean, you wouldn’t want to go flying off the bed and land in the next room. Not that every man has the ability to knock your socks off like that, but remember that you can use the furniture to your benefit. Holding the bed frame above your head makes breasts look perky too, added bonus!
The movie talks about handcuffs, ropes and other things like tape, but don’t use anything that will hurt your wrists. That would be hard to explain at work. Hey, why do you have rope burn on your wrists? Can you imagine? Anyway, you want to protect your body so you don’t resent your intimacy. Keep it fun, keep it safe.
Are you already plotting to buy a new bed that will be more suitable for your intimate life? Good, because when you put effort into making your relationship blossom, it does. There’s no shame in it ladies!
7. Find a sturdy desk
Don’t go breaking any furniture, and please, don’t sit on anything that isn’t meant to hold body weight. Case in point, do not sit on anything mounted to a wall, it could be a very expensive choice.
Christian and Anastasia’s business meeting across the conference table was intimate, not because they laid a finger on each other, but because: one- the room was lit in red light; and two- they spoke openly and honestly about how they felt. When was the last time you told your man exactly what was on your mind? It might catch him off guard and it might win him over. Be blunt and see how it works out for you.
A good desk or table can offer assistance if there is a height discrepancy or it can offer an alternative to the next pose.
8. The lift (strong men only)
When Christian carries Anastasia away from the Piano, she wraps her legs around him and he stands up. This is a good position for strong men only. Don’t do this if your man has a weak back or something, use common sense. Wrap your arms around his neck and tighten your core muscles, the tighter you are the lighter you are. This is effective in the shower, as long as you don’t have a slippery shower floor.
If you lean back and place your feet on his shoulders, you will have graduated to what they call tabletop or armchair. Reach behind you so you don’t fall backwards.
9. Wrestling or loving?
A lot of the playfulness in 50 Shades of Grey comes from the idea of wrestling, as if one person is going to win. As you take down your mate, he will instinctively fight back; luckily this battle will have a happy ending though. The next time you pin him against the refrigerator and make him succumb to your powers, try not to make him feel like you’re controlling him, keep it playful.
Women that are too demanding can be a turn off to men. There is a fine line between playful fighting and aggressiveness, so make sure you just keep it light, otherwise you might scare him off. If you’re mad at him, it’s probably not a good time to kiss and make up.
You really don’t want to get in the habit of bringing that energy into your hopefully positive intimate life. Talk things out and wait till you like each other again. That will help you avoid getting into an argument and spoiling the moment.
10. Puppy dogs say woof
I don’t know if this pose is from the Kama Sutra or something like that, but it resembles puppy pose from yoga. Just like an excited puppy, in this electric pose, you reach forward and put your chest down. This can put a lot of pressure on your lower back so be mindful of that. Essentially, you’re kneeling. So why not look at your man and ask him, seriously, who let the dogs out?
Keeping the fire going between you two can make a big difference in the success or failure in your relationship. Keeping that honeymoon vibe is an important aspect of any healthy relationship, so get ready to take a walk down discovery lane, ladies. By the way, you’re welcome.
Finally, a word of advice: if you don’t feel comfortable with where you are with your body, maybe you’re self-conscious about being too skinny or too heavy, you should just rock it, girl. Be confident with what you have and just smile, tell yourself you’re sexy and get comfortable.
You are beautiful and perfect just the way you are. Put on some perfume, some fun earrings and a sexy outfit, you can do it and you don’t need to be anyone but you!
Hopefully, you are now thoroughly distracted from whatever you were doing before you read this article, and you’ll share it with your besties. As always, thanks for coming to us for your relationship advice here on YouQueen.